Smoke Screen

Can’t be right to hold me back to push me forward

 Then or Now.

I was meant to find my own way, 

But a perpetual show masked true intentions

I wonder who I could’ve been

If I had bothered to look through us;

I would have been a part of others.

This second feeling: I am petrified with my restlessness,

 Which you had caused through fake laughs and white sugar grins

And sophisticated small talk and tags with triple dollar signs.

You seem to be always trying to prove yourself to the right ones.

And I thought I transcended with you.

But now I know and taste the herd’s beguiling call:

I can’t not pity you;

   You’re still stuck in that tawdry existence: an old cypress in a world of Oak and Willow.

I also pity myself for my own party of pity. 

It seems being on top breaks bonds ruthlessly.

Even now, I’ve forgotten who you really are

And how to love you.

I wonder if you know who you really are

�" Avondale Kendja