Memories in the Raindrops

Do you ever watch the raindrops chase each other? Do they take you back to times when you were young? This is my poem about what happens when I decide to watch the Great Raindrop Race.

I watch the raindrops drip from the window
Racing each other to get to the end first
And for a moment my mind takes me back to a time
When I didn’t worry about being thrown out when I would be at my worst.

My mind plays colors of the past I grew up with
Showing vintage videos of my the memories in my youth
That formed me into the girl I walk around today as
Because those certain recalls shadowed the truth.

And while these remembrances glaze over in my eyes
I feel like I’m that young girl that holds an unbroken soul
For when I see myself still with my lion’s mane
It absorbs me into the past where family was still whole.

I remember each time when tears weren’t from pain
And how they were made from laughing wars
That would bring my brother and I to our knees
Just in order to catch our breath and receive our rewards.

Or I remember the days of security in each of the past years
And the days of adventures in Mexico when we lasted a week
Because they were both ways we connected like one
Causing nobody out of the four ever fearing to speak.

But the happy memories then start cracking
Fading to spots of grey when a loud thunder roars
Killing off all the glee in the past as if it is some sort of weed
To open the door for the painful memories that is waiting to be absorbed.

The screams of my parents begin to echo in my mind
While the rain in the present pounds against the car
For each fight that my mom and dad had towards the end
Seemed like the next one could be an explosive war.

Their words weren’t happy but they were desperate
Blaming each other for all that went wrong
Instead of remembering the times
When as a family united we were strong.

I remember crying in my room each time
Holding my orange teddy bear in hope to escape their fight
Because as a fifth grader during this era
I was aware we were breaking and fading into the night.

The memories from there on were no longer free
For even when times were okay, there was still not a flame
And my dad and mom that I grew to love
Always reminded my brother and me that we would not be the blame.

They were all the same from there on those days
And the only way I could escape the sorrow
Was to lock myself in my room to imagine
That I was on the Cancun beach that I always wished we could go back to tomorrow.

So now, when the last raindrop falls from the car
My mind brings me back to this present time
And though I now know a new kind of truth
I’m still waiting for a fantasy sun to shine.

To this day each time when I’m in the car and it rains
I wait for the first raindrop to fall and begin the race
Before letting my mind consume me with the past
Just to make sure that I still remember the times when I was small.

Author's Note

Criticize please!