The Meadows of Dan

Wind swept faces

No marks, no traces

Isn't that what we said---

Secrets kept until we're dead

Agreed to part, forever hearts

We went where angels fear to tread

A dreamscape of memories

One for you, one for me

Cold days, warm hands

Clouds in my coffee---

Even in the dead of winter

Do you ever dream of me?

You made a bonfire of my vanity

And laid me on the alter of your lust

You endured all my attempts at levity

Just to find a friend you could trust

If you go back to the field

There's a tree there

Called the Muse

Inside it, a moment frozen

Intersecting lines were chosen

Write me a poem

So I know that it's you

Please don't tell me

It's too difficult to do

Words softly spoken

All hurt can undo

Through the hour glass slips sand

Each grain a thousand years---

Until I hold your hand

There in the Meadows of Dan

Forever in the Meadows of Dan

Reviews

[Stefano Segnan]

Salutes to you! Most of it is really good. The atmosphere is quite interesting and the imagery is vivid. The third stanza seems to be out of tune with the rest of the writing. Also, I do not see why you changed the structure as the poem progressed, but it didn't stomp on the flow so that was alright.
So, my only complaint is that third stanza which is too different in style, sense, flow from the rest. That aside, methinks it was enjoyable.