Loneliness.

A drug addict becomes consumed with feelings of loneliness.

I couldn't take it anymore.

For the first time in years, I was praying she'd pick up the phone.

I needed to hear her voice. I needed her.

"Come on, mom...please..." was the loudest thought going through my head at the time. Anxiety was finally being silenced by my own thoughts. The thoughts I wanted. The thoughts that came from me.

Voice mail.

I tried again.

Voice mail.

And again.

voice mail.

And again.

Voice mail.

It had to work this time.

Voice mail.

Tears were running down my face. My eyes burned like hell whenever I cried, but I didn't mind it this time. It was nothing compared to everything else I was feeling.

I don't know why I ever expected her to pick up.

After dad died, something inside her broke.

She became like me.

A shut-in.

She'd be alone all the time, mourning his loss. Lying in bed, eyes closed, pretending he was next to her.

I could've helped her.

But I was too scared to leave my world.

Because of me, she lost herself.

Because of my fear, I was alone.

I couldn't fix this.