Eulogy

I killed Rhea off...i think

 

“I remember when I first saw her. She was special. You know the special people that exist that we all know are around us, but never imagine meeting. She was really something. It took me a while to get used to her. She had the most cantankerous attitude. Cantankerous, that’s probably a word she would use. Ha! I knew she would be a challenge. My best friend at Waffles--that’s where I met her, Waffles--said she liked me. She probably would have said fancied, yeah that’s right, she “fancied” me. So I asked her. Every day for about six months I asked her to “hang out.” You know it’s funny now that I think about Rhea; she was a real b***h you know. But I loved her. She said no every day. I had her digits. I ate lunch with her every day we worked together, but she never agreed to a date. Rhea Hart was the one and I knew I would have her eventually. She used to give me advice about everything. Sometimes all I wanted to do was make the move and kiss her, but she wouldn’t even let me get close enough to hug her. Ted was right. She finally agreed to see a movie with me. I remember I couldn’t believe she said yes. Of course she gave the whole explanation; you know what girls do so you don’t know they like you. “I’m only agreeing to go with you because I’m tired of you asking me every day to go just about everywhere with you. This is not a date Luc. So don’t try anything.” I’m still trying to figure out how I got her to agree to come but, it doesn’t matter how at this point. I broke her. I know I’m supposed to be doing a eulogy for her but I can’t believe she’s gone. I don’t want her to be gone. I loved Rhea so much. She shouldn’t have…” Luc Jacobs couldn’t finish the ten-page eulogy he wrote for Rhea. The small circle of friends that he and Rhea had made as a couple looked on as a man whose soul mate had left him behind, broke into sobs. Lorena, Rhea’s high school best friend, rushed to console the man she’d grown to love as a brother, her friend’s widowed husband, as he cried for his wife. She held his hand while she read the eulogy he’d prepared for Rhea. “Rhea Hart was the most brilliant person I ever knew. She taught many people including myself about living. Everyone knew her for her stubbornness. She’d never take no for an answer, but she never resisted saying no to anything she disagreed with. You had to show her facts. When I insisted on doing Rhea’s eulogy, I thought I would know exactly what to say about this beautiful person I had the honor of being married to for 40 years…” Lorena looked at their friends, and looked at Luc. The devastation in his eyes was immeasurable. His face was the picture of a man who’d lost everything--his companion, his memories, his home, his life. Rhea was his life. “Lorena I…I need to…” He didn’t have to say much more, Lorena held his hand while he continued. “Rhea was my world. I remember when I first laid eyes on her; I knew I would marry her. She was a dreamer. Oh this woman could dream. She was pre-Med at City College when we met. I was just making eggs at IHOP. I had no intentions of post-High School education. She spent her first year knowing me, insisting on school. She wouldn’t take no for an answer. And I loved her for it. She came from an upper-middle class family in somewhere on Long Island. Rhea was out of my league. But I wanted her. She loved someone else. I was too much for her. We were from two different worlds. I can still hear her excuses why we couldn’t be together back then. She never said she didn’t like me though. Ha! I knew I had her that day we went to the movies. She was such a nerd. Have you ever seen someone pull out a thousand page book at the movie to read, instead of watching the previews? I’d never seen it before her, and I haven’t seen it since. She was going to change the world. And you know what? She did. After about eight months of pressing about how much I need school, she finally convinced me to sign up for classes. You all know my history by now. Thanks to Rhea’s big mouth, everyone in this town knows everything about me. I hated her for it. Yes, I hated her for telling my story to everyone. it was like she thought everyone needed to know every ounce of our lives for us to be totally free. ‘Free from what?’ That’s what I used to ask this angel of mine. She always knew the special kind of bullshit to tell me. Brilliant as she was, Pumpkin--that was the only nick-name she let me call her--always used her intelligence against me. Oh those beautiful words she’d say to me. Every damned day, we’d get into an argument because she was such a control freak. I’d tell her to leave me alone, stay out of my life, she’d say the same thing, then take it right back and tell me how horrible she’d been, and ask me to forgive her. Then she stopped apologizing one day. I could hear those words ringing in this room right now. 

‘I’m right 95% of the time Luc. I’m tired of apologizing for your bullshit that you start. You of all people should know what I expect, so don’t feed me that bullshit, cause I’m not biting.’ She had one of those mouths on her where you’d just rather agree with her and bite your tongue, for fear of what else might come out of it. Some of you look at me today, and I know you wonder why she chose me. I used to wonder every day the first year we were together. Every time we had a fight, I was sure it’d be the end of us. She called those fights discussions, but anyone who ever witnessed these so-called discussions know that WW2 was a close second to almost all of them. To be honest I never wrote anything to be spoken to a crowd until today. Our daughter insisted on helping me, even this beautiful friend of ours did, but I was sure I had it. I know it’s a bit long-winded but you must understand.” The truth is it was the night before the funeral and Luc, being the nervous wreck that he was about mess up the last thing his wife asked him to do, her eulogy. Lorena watched him as he imagined the crowd that his wife’s funeral would attract the following day. He stood at six-feet tall, with an arch in his back that came with his age. She recollected the stories Rhea would tell her when she and Luc first started dating. She’d hated him. What a jerk he’d been to her at first. Rhea used to practically cover him for every big thing in his life then financially. Too nice, that’s what she’d tell Rhea. Why don’t you just break up with him, Reese, I know he’s your first but come on. He’s an a*****e. He doesn’t give a s**t. He’s immature. He’s always playing these games, one day he’s in town and the next day he’s calling you from westbumbafuck telling you he just wants you to know where he is just in case. Come on Rhea, just break up with him. They were meant to be together though. Just like she and Bruce were meant to be together. Nothing could change that, not even Rhea’s mother. “Luc, we should go to Abbie’s house and go through the eulogy there. There’s no sense in staying here overnight talking to yourself. I’m sure it’ll be fine.” Luc looked at Lorena, shuffled his papers, took his glasses off, put his sweater on and moved in Lorena’s direction. He didn’t say a word. They both walked to his Range Rover; Lorena let him into the passenger’s side, helped him in, closed the door and shuffled to the driver’s side. They pulled out of the parking lot, and headed to Abbie’s apartment in SOHO. Abbie Hart-Jacobs was the only child of their 40-year marriage. Rhea wanted to wait until they had a blanket of savings before having children. So they didn’t get pregnant until they were married for ten years. Luc wanted a little Luc so bad, he’d been talking about little Luc since the first few months of dating. Rhea didn’t even let him touch her, let alone get pregnant. They dated for about a year until she finally asked him to. He was so shocked, he lasted for about a minute. She hated their first time. He remembered the disappointment in her face when it was over. ‘That’s it? Are you kidding? I could’ve waited if I knew’. He remembered thinking what a b***h? She was probably one of the most honest people he knew.

“Lorena, did Rhea ever lie to you about anything?”

“Oh Luc, what are you trying to get at?”

“Honestly, Lorena, do you remember her ever lying to you about anything at all?”

“Rhea didn’t lie, Luc. And if she did, you’d know ‘cause

She’d take it back almost instantaneously. Who the hell says instantaneously anyway?”

“Well she sure rubbed off on both of us. Talking to her was like talking to a dictionary.”

“I know me and the girls from our crew back then used to make fun of her smart a*s every time she opened her mouth.”

“It was easier for her to use the complex word over the simpler synonym.”

“That’s why we loved her, her complicated simplicity.”

“Well Luc, wasn’t that a little oxymoronic?”

“She changed us, and we didn’t even notice--do you ever wonder if she did?”

“Everything Rhea did had a purpose. That’s what she lived for…”

They broke into silence. There was something about the night that left them both unsettled. Rhea Hart was one of the most renowned people since the time of Gandhi. She traveled to 90% of the world, leaving traces of her love and care for the world she lived in. Because of her struggle Africa finally gained control of its natural resources, which had been exploited for more than 200 years before Rhea was born. There were those who loved her, and those who hated to love her. Both of these friends knew exactly whom they’d lost, and their silence only expressed their solemnity. They drove in silence until they finally arrived at Abbie’s West Broadway address. It was Rhea who’d fallen in love with SOHO. Luc loved it, but he never thought he’d afford it. She’d talk about buying that building of hers in the heart of Manhattan and living in the top floor. She talked about it until she finally bought her property in the heart of SOHO. She never quite fit in anywhere else; at least that’s what she’d say time and time again. Tonight SOHO was the most barren it’d ever been. It was clear that their neighbors had told all of the surrounding businesses that Rhea had died. Luc had wanted to keep it as private at possible, but once the word for out it had a domino effect, and before he knew it even people in neighboring areas were sending their condolences. Luc and Rhea had had a tremendously public life. Rhea was convinced that this would protect them. To this day, he still had no idea why they needed protection. It may not have made the most sense to try to cover up her death but for once he wanted them to have a private, closed life. This was impossible and he began to understand more clearly as they cruised down Broadway. There were floral memorials, ceramic memorials and tremendous vinyl signs that extended condolences to the Hart-Jacobs Family. One of the signs had a photograph of Rhea that was taken early on in their relationship. Her big brown eyes were peering through her dark curly locks. She had the happiest grin on her face, which seemed to light up the entire banner. For a second Luc forgot she was dead. She was so beautiful, and her light shone brighter than he remembered that it had. He closed his eyes, because he couldn’t bear to see Rhea’s image spread over the storefronts from Houston to Canal. Lorena unaware of his falling into a trance began to speak about the times she’d had with Rhea. “I remember when we used to go to clubs. People used to think we were enemies. We’d have these dance offs, I’d pull these never before seen dance moves out of my a*s thinking she’d become intimidated. Instead she’d bring it back to the basics and tear me apart on the dance floor with the moves I’d just made up. She really was amazing, Rhea. Luc?” She soon realized that Luc had fallen asleep and turned on the radio to listen to NPR since they had a special on Rhea. Who was she kidding anyway? She’d never listened to NPR before today, and she wasn’t about to start. She turned on the CD player. Rhea and she had made a throwback mixed CD from their college days. Hey Mama by the Black-Eyed Peas was the first song on the track. She instantly remembered the last time Rhea and she had danced on Campus. Some big black guy waved at them as they break-danced on the lawn near the parking-lot to Rhea’s Nissan’s stereo. Rhea had stopped to show her the Beyonce bootie hop that she’d been working on when this giant chocolate toned guy about twenty-five or so honked at them from the neighboring parking lot. A smile shattered Lorena’s somber expression as she remembered the look on Rhea’s face when she told her the guy would probably drive around to see them. She chuckled lightly as she pulled into the parking garage near Abbie’s building. Rhea was her best friend, her only friend really. She never really clicked with the rest of the crew, but Rhea was like a sister to her. She stopped the car, and Luc woke up.

“I didn’t realize I fell out.”

“I did.”

“No s**t, Lorena, did you get Rhea’s smart a*s bug in her will.”

“Lucson Jacobs, we need to laugh. We need to smile. Rhea wouldn’t want us fretting about her. You know that!”

“Au contraire. You know she loved to be the center of everyone’s attention.”

“But only good attention.”

They both grinned. It was the first time they’d smiled together since Rhea died. One week ago. It’d been a only a week and all of the funeral arrangements were done. Tomorrow was the big day. They quickly grabbed their notes and bags, locked the car, and walked to Abbie’s building. Normally they’d have to ring the buzzer, but Abbie gave Luc a key, so he could let himself in whenever he needed to be with someone. He held the door for Lorena, and they walked up the stairs side by side silently. “I really loved her,” said Luc. Lorena smiled at him. “We all did Luc, we all did.”

“The rest of the girls are gonna be here tomorrow morning?”

“Yes they’re coming in five minutes apart at La Guardia, so I’ll be sending them a limousine so they can share car service.”

“That’s perfect. I’m happy they could all make it.”

“Yea, it’s going to be interesting to see them though. It’s been so long, too long even.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

this was one of the first chapters i wrote...but i decided to put it somewhere towards the middle or end of series...we'll see