Ipse

The self is a curious thing.

I am the beast with the slavering jaws
The one who stalks you in your shadow
Enshrouded by numerous flaws
That ragged, bird-pecked scarecrow

You see me not, veiled by the moon
Born of darkness, fleshed by mist
But all I care for is that you will be mine soon
My burning bonds are but a kiss

And I will cradle you dearly
And protect you from the cruel world and reveal to you my own
Perhaps then will you see my love clearly?
My world of shattered glass, screams and bone

It is like light to gloom
Or beauty to the beast
Around you I need not wear this tired costume
By you, this animal is released

Your love for me will come in the future
But for now I feel only hatred
A bloodied, mangy creature
A thing to be dreaded and then discarded

But your love will be mine!
The only thing I do live for
You are my sky, my stars and my sunshine
And on that day of mutual love, the world will be but a healed-over sore.

Reviews

[Pi Cee]

The shadows of world we dont see, but breathe when we breathe, laugh when we laugh, cry when we cry, who see everything in our world while they lay invisible just under the surface free to all our emotions and grasping at our souls.

Need, want. So different, but so close together. a world of shattered glass and screams and bone does well to hide both those and the emotions they come from and cause.

Great write.


-Pi Cee

[Adora.xo]

"And I will cradle you dearly
And protect you from the cruel world and reveal to you my own
Perhaps then will you see my love clearly?
My world of shattered glass, screams and bone"

--There's a pattern here, in your writing. Like looking over scenery washed in candle-light, through an old cracked monocle. It could be just me though :P Anywho, this was a brilliant piece. I thoroughly enjoy how you use objects [i.e. broken glass], familiar sounds and such to symbolize the impending darkness in the piece. I also really like the small references to the work of other authors I've found in a lot of your work, it's neat and I've tried it and I know it isn't easy to get such subtle references in there without sounding like a Wikipedia page.
I think my favorite part (and this is the hopeless romantic in me coming out) has to be the last stanza,
"But your love will be mine!
The only thing I do live for
You are my sky, my stars and my sunshine
And on that day of mutual love, the world will be but a healed-over sore."
The way in which you wrote this reminds me of old poetry, and I absolutely love that, it gives it an antique and an over all genuine feel. Love, and not to be bitter but even if it doesn't last, always heals the heart. But when it's lasting it does a little something else and touches the soul. :] Valentine's Day is tomorrow, drop that last stanza on your gf and I guarantee success! ;]
Anywho, brilliant job! I loved it through and through! :D


~Adora
xo