Memories

The unfortunate life of a son whose father loses his memories

Memories are the reason you know what is what, and who is who. They can be your source of happiness, meanwhile they can be somebody's most terrifying nightmare. Good or bad, they are always the reason of who you are, because if they disappear, your dreams disappear, your identity disappears, your sanity disappears, and in the end, you disappear too, what is left of you is only a mindless doll.

 

This is a story of a caring father, a hardworking doctor, a loving husband, who slowly loses his memories over time.

 

"Dad?"

"Yes, Jared?"

"Dad, Jared passed away two years ago."

"Oh, um, yes...?"

"Dan."

"Yes, Dan?"

 

In a house where he felt like he should pack his bags and leave quickly, he sat in a rocking chair, trying to figure out a sentence from a newspaper by constantly reading it. No matter how many times he read it, he couldn’t comprehend the meaning of it.

 

His son stared at him with hopeless and broken eyes as he saw the struggles of what used to be one of the most capable men. His chest felt heavy as he watched his father's shaky arms try to hold the newspaper in place. "Can you come with me?" He managed to speak out, the words feeling heavy on his tongue. With glasses almost falling off the old man's nose, he looked up through them to meet the eyes of his only son, "Sure." He folded the newspaper as neatly as his trembling hands could. Soon enough, Dan led his father to a long and cold hallway that echoed their weak footsteps. 

 

With each step they took in that hallway, they passed by a variety of large wooden framed pictures filling the walls of the narrow hallway with smiles and laughter. Knitting his brows in confusion, the father went ahead of his son, taking in the framed pictures that screamed memories, things he lacked. The people in the pictures were almost like strangers, yet he felt a small connection between him and them. In one picture, there was a middle aged doctor surrounded by elderly people in hospital gowns. They had their arms around the doctor who faked an annoyed expression. His eyes landed on another picture, a picture of a big family having a picnic, and another picture that showed a young man in a suit holding hands with a beautiful bride.

 

"Do you remember any of them?" he whispered in a hoarse voice, fearing if he spoke a tone louder, his voice would give away his weakness. The father's silence spoke louder than words. He was speechless, what can he say to his poor son? The old man felt ashamed of himself and couldn't think of anything to say to comfort his only family.

 

Everything felt meaningless to him. His supposed wedding, his childhood pictures, and what made him feel worse was the friends & family that he can never remember. Seeing 'himself' in the pictures made him felt like an intruding outcast.

 

He averted away from his son's miserable gaze, there was nothing he could say to make him feel better. He clutched his fists until they turned white, he felt so useless, a burden on his son who should be with his friends, but is stuck with an old man who just recently learnt the name of his two sons.

 

The more he locked himself up in his thoughts, the less was his will to live. He tried to speak, but his tongue was too heavy for him. "I-I'm-." He gulped down roughly, his eyes focusing on the ground. With the thought of disappointing his only son and being abandoned in an elderly care home, he felt tears slowly building up, but he refused to show them and destroy the image he had as a strong father. 

 

Just as he felt his only family member trying to hug him, he broke down in tears, his voice cracking. "..re-really sorry." The knees that held him strong were gone. The clear vision he had was damaged. The tongue he used to give inspiring speeches was slowly weakening. The arms that he used to carry his two children could no longer handle even lightweight boxes. The brain he used to treat thousands of people couldn’t let him remember the mother of his kids.

 

Dan spent his time comforting his father.

 

Many months passed, and not one day went by without him helping his father, and it had reached a point where he couldn’t hold a spoon properly. 

 

"Come on, you can do it!" Dan encouraged his dad when he was trying his best to hold a spoon on his own. Seeing his shaky hand drop the utensil suddenly made him lose the last bit of hope that his father could get better. But, just as he noticed his father was observing his reaction, he threw a masked sad smile and hugged him, whispering, "You did enough, dad."

 

Just like every morning, the annoying alarm sound woke Dan up. He groaned, reaching to his bed stand. He sleepily searched for his phone, sending things slamming to the ground in the process. He opened one eye to look at the time, 6:02AM, time to get up.

 

Ever since his own father stopped being able to move, Dan made it his own duty to help him. Sure, his social life became nonexistent, but he cared for his father more than anyone.

 

After washing himself, he went to prepare the usual breakfast, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, fast yet delicious.

 

"Dad, your food is ready!" 

 

No answer.

 

Shrugging, he went to eat his own sandwich, his dad was probably still sleeping. While eating, he couldn't shake off the bad feeling he had. Leaving the half eaten sandwich on his plate, he quietly walked to his dad's room. Just as he opened the door, his eyes met a terrified pair, hiding under the bed cover. "Um, dad, are you okay?" Just as he took one step forward, his father was ready to throw the nearest thing at him, his eyes wide. "What in the world are you doing?" His son whispered, thousands of questions hitting him all at once.

 

"W-Who are you..?"

 

and that is when Dan's world came crashing down.