Last Words

I woke up in the middle of my living room floor. The sun shone bright through my window and onto my back. I laid in its warmth as the memories of last night flooded into my mind. My body tensed and I pulled myself up. My first thought was to call the police, but I knew what that would do. I couldn’t have police over here. I scratched my brain. There was nothing I could do. He was gone. I couldn’t get him back. I trudged into my bedroom on the edge of tears. On my bed was a black leather jacket. Zach’s jacket. I threw myself at it and held it tightly to me. I held it there for a moment when something caught my eye. Next to the jacket there was a stuffed puppy and around its neck was a ribbon with a something attached to it. I bent down and examined it and saw that it was a little golden ring. I slowly untied the ribbon and held the ring up. A tear slipped from my eyes. He’d known I wouldn’t go with him. I turned back to the puppy and picked it up and a note fell from it. I just stared at it. After a moment I got the courage to read it. My hand moved shakily toward the wrinkled sheet of folded paper. I grabbed it and slowly unfolded the pages. I closed my eyes before I read it. This may be the last thing I would ever hear from him. I opened my eyes and read:

 

            Hey, I don’t really know where to start. This is Zach, in case you didn’t know. I guess I’m really writing this so I can make myself be okay with leaving you. I knew you wouldn’t go anyway, but I feel like an idiot leaving you here. I don’t even think I’ll be able to leave you here. I’d much rather go to jail than be without my best friend. I’m not leaving because I’m scared, I’m leaving because I don’t want you to be scared. I don’t want you to worry about me. I know this letter sounds like a jumbled up mix of words, but that’s all I’ve got. I don’t really know what else to tell you. I don’t know how to make what I’ve done to you okay. I tried I guess. I left you my jacket and that stuffed animal, and I’m also leaving you with my mom’s ring. If you just wear it, then you can remember that were going to find each other again some day, I promise. You’ve always been there for me and I promise to be there for you. I promise. I guess I’m just rambling words out now because I don’t want to stop talking to you. I don’t want this to be over. I wanted something more intelligent to leave you with, but I guess I don’t have anything of that level in my mind. Anyway, I promise I’ll miss you, and I’ll be safe, just promise me the same. Promise me you’ll be okay? I’m going to trust that you said you promise.

       Love, Zach

P.S.I never told you this, but  

P.S. BE SAFE!

 

            “I promise.” I said aloud, but the crossed out line bugged me. What hadn’t he told me? What bugged me even more is that this let me know he really hadn’t thought anyone would try to stop him. He hadn’t thought anyone was out to get him. He’d promised he’d see me again, and for all I knew he was dead. He was dead. No. I couldn’t think like that. He wasn’t dead, he had to be okay.