patintly waiting

 

sun was high in the sky

little girl i was, sitting on the steps

waiting for you to come along

suitcase pack, joy in my heart

for this weekend was your turn.

 

still sitting on the steps

waiting for you to come

look at the clock time has passed

hours move on by.  

 

night time came

i grab my suitcase and ran

to the my warm bed

i didn't cry i grew angery

phone i heard was mom yelling

good i'm glad,

 

grew up fast

and still no you

now and again we share time

but no bond was ever made

even in your house i still had to wait.

 

so dear old dad,

you wonder why i don't phone

because when i need you the most

you where like a ghost

you were supposed to chase why my fears

and protected me from the evil ways

 

i grew up strong

with the strength of mom

she stood by me in my times

of need,

 

you are my father, dad

and in my heart love is true

even though you hurt me so

so the time will wait

but will I.

 

Reviews

[Matthew Kult]

I am sure he regrets not being there, to see something so beautiful and wonderful grow from his....donation. A very personal and powerful piece, that took courage and strength to write.

It does need some editing, spelling and tightning flow, but they don't take away from the over all meaning. This was touching, and reached me on a similar level. Great job.

Always,

Matthew

[cfix]

This is so sad...I am sorry.
Powerful write!!!

[FJ Davis]

It's good that you still have some respect and regard for your dad. Such an attitude is healthier for you--and, perhaps, a little hopeful for your father.
We dads sometimes let our children down so badly; not easy for even us to understand. I'm sorry things weren't better for you, d.
I like your sincere, heartfelt (I'll bet you hear that word a lot) poem. You always seem to reach people.

[Chris Smith Welshpoetcs]

You show a love for your parents, and that time will heal. Good poem my friend.

[Ashley]

i agree with matthew that there are certainly some grammatical/spelling issues to work on here.

the content though is expressed wonderfully. emotional and touching. it's sad yet strong, and deeply personal. well done.

[Coyote Poetry]

Every action good and bad had effect. The story is very sad. When we need our parent and are left alone to learn the proper way of life. Easy to feel alone. A good mother is the key. A mother love is permanent. I like the ending to the poem. Some lessons can teach us to be better. A excellent poem.
Coyote

[Althelia Marie Caine]

AMAZING