What is This

So tender and frail

like a dark cloud that lingers above

so calm yet so loud.

Like a ton of bricks on my chest

so heavy yet beautifully laid.

The air I take in to breathe, so refreshing

yet suffocating me as I try to take it all in.

There is something there, I can feel it,

I just know.

This numbness cannot consume me.

I want to win. I fight for it.

I will break the cycle in which I constantly spin.

I must make this false smile upon my face truthful again.

I must learn to stand tall and proud.

I must remember to never look back.