This blue box

We built this for you, let it remind you...

This blue box, let it take you through time and

Space. Let it remind you of these two years
Remind you of dorms covered with white strands
Remind you of the time spent with your peers

 

Remind you of your friends, Nicha and I
Remind you of what we would do for you
Remind you that you deserve all the sky,
Of the TV shows we watched as days flew

 

Let it light up your nights, when it is dark

Let it remind you of us, despite our

Goodbyes. Of running about Cornwall park

Remind you of doing art at all hours

 

Let it remind you wherever you are

That you have friends here, that you are a star

Author's Note

This sonnet (probably not true Iambic pentameter) is something I wrote for my friend. She is leaving this year so I got her a TARDIS lamp. This sonnet references what we have done through out the two years I have known her.

Reviews

[DaughterNature]

You're right - it's not really iambic pentameter (although your lines definitely have 10 syllables each). The trick is really to get a feel for the iambs themselves. Some moments of success were "Remind you of what we would do for you" and "That you have friends here, that you are a star." A lot of your lines actually start with a strong rather than a weak syllable (This, Space, Let), or the rhythm gets jumbled after "Remind."

When in doubt, say it out loud! If it sounds unnatural, try to rethink the wording to get the rhythm right.

[Ashley]

Thank you for the help and review.