It's Like a Bad Sitcom Without the Laugh Tracks

What is normal exactly anyway?

Ashira sat in her brother's bedroom at the computer, listening to Lapfox Trax as loud as possible through her brother's black and red set of large headphones.  They covered the entirety of her ears, and the noise carried an entire room away.  Usually this was her brother, Cartel's, thing, but today she decided to do a little switch up, mostly because she didn't want to deal with the world around her on this particular day.  So there she sat in her brother's bedroom at his desk, listening to music on his computer, and nothing more.

Ashira closed her eyes, letting the sound envelop her entire consciousness.  Aside from the tapping of her foot and finger, the occasional head-bob for certain songs, and sometimes even singing along, one would think she'd fallen asleep like this.  At one point when the song "Something Beautiful" by NegaRen came on, she removed the headphones, unplugging them from the computer and letting the song play.  She opened her eyes, letting her hands rest on the wire for a while before sighing.  She leaned back, looking up at the ceiling and singing,

You're always there when I need you... You're something beautiful... something beautiful.  You're something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful...You're something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful...  You're always there when I need you...  You're something beautiful...something beautiful.  You're something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful...  You're something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful...  You're always there when I need you...  You're something beautiful...something beautiful...   You're always there when I need you...  You're something beautiful...something beautiful.

Suddenly she heard a voice behind her.  "That is by far the most repetitive, yet nice song I've heard ya sing in the past 30 minutes, kid."

She felt her skin crawl with embarrassment.  "H-how long...30 minutes...?"

Cartel nodded, getting up and off of his bed.  He pocketed his hands and walked over to the desk and chair Ashira sat at.  He leaned forward slightly, then said, "Kayleigh's in the living room.  She was here before me."

Ashira squeaked lightly with all the emotional build up.  She was tight and her muscles stiff, feeling really humiliated.  "I-I-I thought you wouldn't be home for another couple hours." She chuckled halfheartedly, her face beat red and her heart pounding.  "Sorry for touching your stuff."

He chuckled back, turning off his computer, then put a hand to her head, messing up her hair.  "Don't sweat it, kiddo.  Just gimme a little fair warning next time.  It freaked me a out a little bit when I called your name like five times and my only response was," He proceeded to shout-sing, "'Six little eggs on the run, they f**k each other, three goes boom-doobie-dum!'*" He did a little dance for each of the last three words, then laughed lightly and looked back at her. "Seriously, let's get some MJ up in this s**t - Aaow!" He grabbed his crotch with one hand, pushing his imaginary hat down with his other one, and pelvic thrusted.

Ashira laughed and rolled her eyes.  "Come on now, let's go give Kay Kay some company.  Besides, I'm making you guys dinner and I need to get it out of the oven anyway."

She grabbed his hand, standing up and leading him out into the living room.  "Wait, is Saide home from work early then?"  Cartel questioned as Ashira waved at Kayleigh.

"I haven't seen him, no," Kayleigh chimed in.  "Why?"

Cartel suddenly gained a disappointed expression.  "Oh...well we're having another late dinner then."

"Hey, hey, don't doubt my cooking skills yet!  While you and her were out clothes shopping the other day, Saide taught me how to make a good, healthy meal without burning it." Ashira opened the oven, taking a peek inside before closing it again and looking around the kitchen for something.

Cartel popped a squat on the couch beside Kayleigh as she read a college book, making notes in another notebook at her other side.  "We all know you can make sandwiches, pizza, and mac and cheese just fine, but you know how that never fills us up."

Ashira proceeded to put on some oven mits she'd found in a drawer to her right.  She lightly kicked the drawer to close it as she opened the oven, pulling out a sheet of some sort.  She put it down on the counter-top to her left, but it was still out of Cartel's and Kayleigh's sights because it was behind the bar. "No...I made something super special for our movie night tonight."  Ashira took a small piece of something, something brown, light, and fluffy with a crispy crust and put it in her mouth.  "Mmmm... Saide was right, this Lembas Bread is to die for!"

Kayleigh and Cartel's eyes widened as they looked at each other, then turned to Ashira again.  "Wait, what?"  Kayleigh said as her eyebrow raised.

"You mean like on Lord of the Rings?" Cartel questioned.

"Exactly that!" Ashira took the pan and placed it on the counter-top of the bar.  The bread looked mouth-wateringly delicious.  This alone sent Cartel and Kayleigh running towards the bar, ready to devour the bread whole, but still skeptical about it since it was Ashira's cooking, after all.

Cartel and Kayleigh couldn't help it - they both reached out to take a small piece off.  Ashira just smiled dumbly while the two put the small chunks in their mouth and practically had an orgasm at the wonderful taste.

"Ash, you are DEFINITELY gonna need to learn more from Saide.  This is f*****g delicious!"  He said with a half full mouth, followed by an extremely extreme "Mmmm!"

Kayleigh nodded furiously mumbling with a full mouth, "You can say that again!"

Suddenly the door swung open and Saide came bursting in.  "I'm hoooo~me!" he sang, raising his arms out and smiling widely as if he's just finished a musical number of some sort.  After pausing and keeping his pose for a short while, he put his arms down, shutting the door behind him, and noticed everyone crowded by the kitchen.  "Oh, is my Lembas Bread done?"  He walked over, sneaking in between Kayleigh and Cartel to snag a small bite.  He popped it in his mouth, then chewed with an odd look.  He held up his hand, shaking it a bit back and forth.  "Could use a few more minutes in the oven."  He shrugged, then hummed to himself a happy tune, walking as chipper as ever into his bedroom.

Cartel and Kayleigh had totally stopped chewing by now, and with deep glares in their eyes, they looked into Ashira's very soul.  She laughed nervously and raised her arms in surrender before the two of them simultaneously pointed at her yelling, "LIAR!!!"

Welcome to the family.

Author's Note

*Song is "Eggs" by Mayhem

Please read the introduction before reviewing this book and/or chapter. Picture not mine.

Information gathered from Cracked.com, believe it or not: http://www.cracked.com/article_15643_5-scientific-reasons-zombie-apocalypse-could-actually-happen_p2.html