Can you read between the lines

Was listening to "I Caught Fire" by the Used while writing; this is mostly just a rant, nothing special. Sorry for crappy and emo-ness

Woke up again today, just like every other day.  It seems so mundane now.  It all started with you.  Ever since you left me I have done literally nothing.  I stay home all day, sleep more often than I should...I've lost the will to simply get up in the morning.

I'm over you, that's for sure, but it doesn't feel like I am anymore.
I still think about you every day, but like in my dreams you fade away.
You're not as important as you once were, but to you I was never important - I'm not her.

You were a huge part of my life, and for years you were there for me...at least I thought so.  I don't understand what's so different about now and then.  All that changed was a few months time...it feels like years have passed, and miles have grown between us.  I'll never stop caring about you, that's something I have grown to accept, but what about you?

Do you think of her?
Do you think of me?
I wonder what will become of us three.
Will we meet again?
Or is this the end?
I simply can't predict the future.

The world is a lot harsher than I thought it was.  I suppose that's naive, to think there's a such thing as "best friends forever" but I believed you when you spoke those words.  How can you just ignore me the way you do?  I don't understand...we go years practically attached at the hip, you claimed you loved me, you even said you'd wait for me 'til the day you died no matter what that meant... why is it so easy for you to tell me that's not true now?  I'm honestly asking you, because I would give anything to get rid of these thoughts of you, these dreams, these nightmares, these hopes...

Nothing I say makes any sense
Can you read between the lines?
I feel like I'm stuck on a fence
Can you read between the lines?
The grass is greener on the other side
Can you read between the lines?
But does the thrill make it worth the ride?
Can you read between the lines?

One side is safe
Can you read between the lines?
But the other has you
Can you read between the lines?
I can stand a couple scrapes
Can you read between the lines?
But your emotional beatings; I just don't know
Can you read between the lines?

I'd like to say that I hate you, and I want nothing more than to scream at you, to scold you for the way you treated me...for the way you treat me.  At the same time, I want to call you just to hear your voice, I want to see you again, and smile like I used to with the friend I thought I had.  Truth is you never loved me, you just loved the safety net I offered.  "I'll wait for you forever." That wasn't just some pathetic teenage crap; it was pure honesty.  I will wait for you.  I'll wait for your apology, for you friendship, for your honesty.  I'll wait for this forever, because you'll never be there for me again.  I hate you for this, all because I care too much to let go of this strong pull for you.  I can't simply not care like you do.  I have to feel something for you...anything.

I'm melting in your eyes
like my first time
that I caught fire
Just stay with me, lay with me
now...

Never caught my breath
every second I'm without you
I'm a mess

Author's Note

PICTURE NOT MINE. "I Caught Fire" by the Used is NOT MINE either