Dad

 

“Your father is seeing a cardiologist on Friday.”

 

 

That was my mum.  She’d just dumped the news on me, out of the blue, without explanation, without anything, as usual.  My mum and I have a complicated relationship.

 

But my dad…  has always been my role model, my lifeline, the person who offered hugs and consolation when I got dumped by my boyfriends, the one person I went to when I found out I was pregnant and on my own, the one person who could always reassure me when it felt that everything was amiss…  I’ve always gotten on extremely well with my dad, and I’ve always been “his darling little girl”.  Even though I’m now 30, nothing has changed.

I guess my brothers and I have been a bit selfish.  Dad earns a very good living as a doctor, and although we’re all grown-ups now, he’s helped us financially quite a few times.  All three of us.

I knew he worked too much.  80 hours a week?  Who can work that much for months at a time? 

“I don’t have a choice, we’re short on staff, and I’m chief of E.R., it’s my duty to be there”.

How many times have I heard that “excuse”.  I thought at times he was exaggerating, and he was really addicted to his job.

But lately, it’s true that I found him tired all the time, stressed out, snappy…  All that work is finally taking its toll.

And now I hope it’s not too late. 

Forgive me for being selfish one last time, dad, but please get better, because if I lose you, I don’t know how I’ll manage.  I’ve lost enough people already.