Dead Men Sea

It is hard to survive more than a week
but I'm still here, unhealthy, but alive
mourning my friends, they thought them weak
they keep us together, separated, the jewish hive
they treat us as if we were infected
but there's nothing wrong with us
have we made a mistake? It all was unexpected
it makes me want to scream, to cuss.

Here I lay, on a dead men sea,
there's no hope to live for as you can see,
carcasses burn on this cold winter day,
but as soon as this finishes, it will all be okay.

Author's Note

Ignore bad grammar, if any.

Reviews

[Monica]

Very good! I think its a really great poem and its well written. I don't think the words sound forced at all.

[deeps]

Wow! Now this is amazing!
I liked this alot. Wonderful flow.

[Lilith]

This poem was good, but the rhythm seemed to falter in a few places. It was almost as if you were struggling to write it, so the words were sort-of forced. It could use a little rewording in a few places, but other than that it's a great poem :]