Atara

They were luminous silver with angular edges protruding at awkward angles. They stood on sphere like pedestals, making them at least three meters in height; each strewn artistically across the dark blue grassy terrain. The trees loomed serenely around them hiding any view of the city from where Xavier sat. 

            “Feels like Fin just took the plunge.” Sam said from besides him.

            Almost instantly, there was a loud crash in the canopy of white leaves above them as a blurred shape shot towards the ground. The body came to a gut wrenching stop, and a smiling red faced Fin hovered in the sky.

            “How‘s it going?” Fin asked giddily. Sam grunted a response as he gently lowered Fin to the side. It was obvious he was beginning to tire; sweat shone on his forehead, and his face was scrunched up in concentration. His hands had a slight shake to them as he raised them up in preparation to catch Eric.

            “Are you going to be alright?” Xavier asked worried. He himself had never used his magic to the point of exhaustion, and thus had no idea what the consequences of doing so would be. It seemed as though Sam was in obvious pain, but he wasn’t sure he could be of any help himself.

            “I’m alright, you’re just heavier than expected, I actu……Eric isn’t jumping.” Sam said abruptly, sounding perplexed.

            “I doubt he would. He’s a coward after all.” Fin said nonchalantly as he walked around inspecting their surroundings. His gaze seemed to occasionally get lost in the clear blue sky, and a reminiscent expression would pass across his face.    

            “He’s not a coward; he just doesn’t know we survived.” Xavier said a little annoyed by Fin’s frankness.

            “Whether he knew or not, he wouldn’t jump. That’s just how he is. He won’t do it since he could lose his life. At least he wouldn’t do it willingly.” Fin said shrugging in indifference.

Xavier was a little taken aback; Eric had always been the mischievous one. He had never seemed to care about what others thought, and only ever did what he wanted to. Yet, now that Fin had said it out loud, Xavier found himself agreeing with the statement. Eric was mischievous, yes, but only when he couldn’t get in trouble by it. Only when he didn’t have to face the conflict himself; only when he knew someone else, usually Xavier, would take the heat.

“Whether he’s a coward or not, we still need him to jump.” Sam said.

“Why? Can’t we just come back for him later?” Fin asked.

“That would only be possible if we were going to leave the same way we came in.”

“Well, he’s not going to jump any time soon. Can’t you just pull him down?”

Sam glared at him, “Did you already forget how high the wall is? I would have slowed down your falls if I could do that.”

“Fine, then how’s about we leave and come deal with it later?” Fin asked frustrated with being held back.

“What if he decides to jump while we aren’t there? Who’ll catch him?” Sam asked pedantically.

“Fine, let’s wait then.”   Fin said pouting.  

“Maybe I can send him some sign, levitate a rock up the wall or something.” Sam proposed under his breath. However, Xavier could tell from the fatigue in his voice that Sam could in no way levitate a rock up the wall.

“I could try something.” Xavier found himself saying, not knowing whether it was his worry for Sam and Eric or his own anticipation at the prospect of entering the city that had propelled him to intervene.  

Fin and Sam both regarded him curiously. “Try what?” Sam asked.

“Telepathy,” Xavier said, although he was unsure he would be able to do so, “maybe I can convince him to jump down.” He added dubiously. Last time Xavier had tried telepathy, Sam had been standing near him and the message had missed. Xavier wasn’t sure he could reach Eric from this distance.

“I doubt that’ll work.” Fin said placidly voicing Xavier’s thoughts.

“Do you think you’ll be able to reach him from here?” Sam asked ignoring Fin’s pessimism.

“I don’t know. The first time I ever even tried to speak telepathically was this morning. Maybe I can, if I concentrate enough.” Xavier answered doubtfully.  

“Well we don’t have much to lose, so go on.”  

Xavier nodded, and walked up to where Sam stood. He looked up at the blue sky just visible above the interloping white leaves. He took one final glance at his surroundings before taking a deep breath, and closing his eyes. When he decided he felt ready, Xavier opened his mind as he had done the day before.

It all came in a rush. Burning his eyes, his ears, and his mind. There was too much coming in at once. Too much to understand, too much to intake. He could feel everything. From the trees and grass around him, to the wall before him. He could feel the energy emanating from all around him at once. But this feeling was nothing like within Abscond. The energy here was much stronger, much more concentrated within innate objects, much more potent. But what hurt most, were the voices he could hear. He could hear a million voices behind him, all living, and all talking. Some were as soft as whispers, while others were piercing screams. The voices were everywhere, and they were suffocating him.     

Xavier gasped loudly as he broke from the trance. His head spun, and he felt numb all over. Fin and Sam watched him carefully, Sam’s mouth upturned in a small smile.

“I passed out the first time I heard their voices,” he said softly, “You need to find his. Find Eric’s voice.”  He added encouragingly.

Xavier regained his bearings. He found himself staring at Sam. He watched him pensively. Xavier had heard Sam’s voice in the few minutes of insanity that had consumed his mind, and what he had heard troubled him.

“I’ll try it differently.” Xavier finally said as he walked past Sam into a small growth of trees that hid the wall behind them. He could feel their eyes follow him as he went, but was unperturbed.

Xavier teared through the undergrowth and low hanging branches until he found himself face to face with the great wall of Perineum. Even before he touched it, he could feel it humming with energy. He was sure there was something special about the walls, but wasn’t sure what. He gingerly placed both his hands onto the walls smooth white surface. He closed his eyes once more, bracing himself for the pain he was sure to come before tentatively opening his mind once more.   

This time however, Xavier concentrated on the wall before him, pushing out everything other than the wall. He could still hear a couple of loud insistent voices calling out to him, but he ignored them. Xavier tilted his head towards the sky, as he spread his mind upward. It felt as though his consciousness had been split in half. He was partially aware of his body standing stock still against the wall, but was also aware of his consciousness ascending the wall at an alarming speed.

The higher his consciousness went, the less voices he could hear, and after a while, Xavier settled into a sort of silent bliss. He could still feel everything around him, but it was all less overpowering. The higher he went, the more he became aware of a small voice coming from the top of the wall. It emanated strong anger, fear and sorrow.  The voice, which was but a whisper repeated the cycle on and on, anger, fear, sorrow. The voice repeated to itself, as if it were a mantra, “Why must I? I cannot! I must.”

“Eric?” Xavier said, reaching out for the voice. He felt Eric panic, felt him jump back in fear. “Eric, it’s me, Xavier.” He said firmly.

Xavier felt Eric pause as though he were in thought. “Xavier, is that you?” The voice which now clearly sounded like Eric’s said.

“Yes, it’s me. Why haven’t you jumped yet?”

“How are you talking to me? Is Fin alright?”  

“He’s fine, we’re all here waiting for you. Come on, jump.”

Xavier felt an overpowering wave of fear wash over Eric as he said, “I can’t, it’s too high, and how can I be sure Sam will catch me?”

“He caught Fin and I, he’ll catch you.” Xavier said suddenly feeling tired. Eric’s fear was spreading to him, a cold sticky feeling that he felt to his bones.

“No, he’ll drop me. He’s an enchanter, and I’m not, he doesn’t care whether I survive or not.” Eric said, a wave of anger erupting from him, burning Xavier, causing the other half of him on the ground to shout out in pain. 

“He does care, he won’t let you die, just calm down and think it through.”

“He doesn’t care! None of the enchanters, human or perfect care! They didn’t care when dad died, and they don’t care now!” Eric shouted, sending a wave of pain across Xavier’s mind and body, but Xavier couldn’t say anything, for his consciousness had been sucked into Eric’s.

******************************************************************************           

            He found himself standing in the middle of their old house. The polished wooden walls decorated with jewel embedded swords, and helms. In one corner of the room stood a complete set of knight’s armor, once having belonged to his step great grandfather.

            He brought his attention to a large bed in the middle of the room. At once, Xavier knew what was happening. He was inside one of Eric’s memories, in a day he remembered all too well.

Their dad lay in bed, his face deathly pale, his skin cracked and peeling, his eyes swollen, and his breath coming with small coughing fits. The rest of the family stood around the bed looking grief stricken. A ten year old Marc stood whimpering into his mother’s apron. Marc had been softer back then, more pliant, less jaded, Xavier thought to himself. The death of their father had made him into who he was today, a father of two.

            Eric stood near his father, red eyed. He seemed both angry and sad at once. Xavier saw himself too, the only one on the bed, his father holding him in his arms. The nine year old Xavier seemed detached if not confused. He himself remembered that it had taken many years before he had adjusted to his new family.

            “Can’t they do anything?” The young Eric suddenly said.

            “The doctors say it’s too late.” Their mother answered calmly, her face contorted with the effort of holding back tears.  

            “Not the doctors, the perfects! Can’t they save him? They have magic don’t they?!” Eric said angrily.

            “We cannot bother the perfects for our own selfish needs.” Their mother answered mechanically. 

            “But they can save him! They have the power to save him! We have to ask!” Eric pleaded, his anger fading into despair.

            “They don’t care.” Marc said softly from his mother’s side.

            Eric looked at him angrily, but before he could retort, he was interrupted by a small raspy voice. “Take care…….. of……. Xavier…… ” It was their father. He who’d been detachedly staring into empty space turned his gaze towards the rest of his family.

            “What is it father?” Marc asked running to his side.

            “Take care of your brother Xavier.” He repeated slowly, blood dribbling from his lips.

            “Why Xavier? We’re not even blood related! Marc and I are here, but all you talk about is Xavier, always Xavier!” Eric scram.

            Their dad closed his eyes for a long time before slowly opening them once more. “Vanessa, do not throw the boy out………he is our son now………take care of him………he is the son of a friend…..” He said looking straight into his wife’s eyes. His statement was followed by a strong fit of bloody coughs.

            “You’re dying and he’s all you think about! But can’t you see he doesn’t even care!? We care father! Please father, just listen to me for once.” Eric pleaded glaring at Xavier, who stared back in silent indifference.

            “He’s probably the one who brought the disease!” Eric continued sobbing uncontrollably.

            “Stop Eric. Stop right now.” Their mom said severely. “Don’t soil you’re father’s wishes.” She said firmly.

            Eric glared intently at Xavier. However the act of bravado was soon broken as Eric’s face fell into one of pure anguish, “I just want my dad. But he just wants you. And you don’t care.” Eric said softly, tears streaming from his eyes.

            “You don’t care. You never care,” Eric said, “I don’t understand why he loves you so much. You don’t care about him, but he’s dying thinking of you. What type of monster…….

            But Eric never got to finish his phrase. Xavier felt anger swell within him, and the scene around him paused. He had never felt such anger before. Why was he seeing this? Why was he letting Eric make him relive this moment of his life? Why was Eric blaming him for something he couldn’t control? Xavier remembered the day all too well. He had been affected by the death of his father, he had loved him, and he had cared. Xavier had never been good at expressing his feelings was all.

            But what had angered Xavier had been the word ‘monster’. It had been the first and only time Eric had called him that, but Xavier had never forgotten, he’d pushed the thought away as the years had gone by and Eric and he had gotten closer. But now Eric had forced him to hear it again. To relive the day Xavier had truly been hurt, had truly felt alienated.

            “Do not let the human dominate us.” A deep metallic voice whispered into Xavier’s ear. But he didn’t have time to fear the voice as he felt an inhuman rage go over him. He wouldn’t let Eric hurt him again. His anger was so intense, it seemed to melt the scene before him, and Xavier found his consciousness released from Eric’s.

            “Don’t you ever do that again.” He said angrily at Eric.

            “What?”

            “I said, don’t you ever put me through that again!”

            “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

            “The human is mocking us.” The metallic voice said.   

            “Jump.” Xavier found himself saying.

            “No, I can’t” Eric said fearfully.  

            Xavier’s patience ran out. He knew what he had to do. Xavier brought his conscious to Eric’s, and entered it forcefully. He felt Eric gasp in pain as he himself was assaulted with Eric’s feelings of fear, anger, and sorrow. He could hear Eric’s thoughts, see his memories, but Xavier ignored it all. Instead, he said one word into Eric’s mind, “Jump.”

            He felt Eric’s body walk towards the edge of the wall, his mind screaming in protest. But Eric’s body paused at the edge, and Eric’s voice boomed into Xavier’s mind. “Please Xavier, please don’t make me do it!” Eric pleaded, but Xavier pushed down his voice.

            “I will only say it one more time. Jump.” Xavier said, putting all his anger into his words. He felt Eric’s body jump and felt the horror Eric felt as it did so.

Xavier broke the connection and returned to his own body. He had a huge headache and felt tired. He brought up his hand to his nose and whipped off the blood that had leaked from it.

            “He jumped!” Xavier shouted as he headed towards Sam. As if to answer his call, there was a loud crash in the trees above, and when Xavier had left the growth of trees, there was a hunched up, crying Eric on the ground. His sobs sounding pained and raspy. But Xavier didn’t stop to comfort his brother, he was still mad at him. Sam looked at Xavier questioningly, and Xavier smiled sarcastically in return.

            “Let’s go.” He said softly as he passed the three boys, and headed in the direction of the voices he’d heard before. It wasn’t until Xavier’s adrenaline rush had subsided that his anger turned into fear. He’d never felt such fury, and he was sure that it hadn’t been his, but that of the voice within him.

            “Do not alienate me Xavier,” the metallic voice whispered into his head sardonically, “you and I are one. It was us who wanted to put the human in his place.”

            “You aren’t me. I am me.” Xavier said out loud, his voice cracking with fear. 

            The voice laughed, a sound that sent chills up Xavier’s back. “Atara,” it said softly, “the monster which is us, is called Atara.” 

            Xavier walked on, suppressing the voice within him, ignoring the feeling of recognition he felt at the name the voice had said.