Thoughts on Scottish Independence

Imperialism comes in many guises,

but cruelly caustic, just like sickly sweet,

the poison kills all those who chance to eat:

each dawn is different, but the sun still rises.

 

They’ll patronise you, praise you to the hilt,

and, sniffling, sing your sentimental songs:

weep in their whiskey over ancient wrongs,

as German princes ponce around in kilts.

 

They’ll give you Tartan Tax, the Stone of Scone,

but grab the golf, Glenfiddich, gasoline, grouse:

you have the hovels, they get Holyroodhouse:

reward you with a well-worn wooden spoon.

 

What starts as Braveheart ends as Brigadoon,

for he who pays the piper calls the tune.

Author's Note

Tartan Tax -- A sop offered to Scotland by the London government, enabling the Scots to adjust their rate of income tax (very slightly)
The Stone of Scone -- This ancient stone was used since time immemorial as part of the Scottish coronation ceremony for new kings. When England conquered Scotland militarily the stone was removed to London. Recently, the English government has graciously allowed the Scots to have their stone back. ("Scone" is pronounced "skoon".)
Holyroodhouse -- The royal palace (for English monarchs only) in Edinburgh, Scotland's capital city.