Saying Goodbye

She flicked a stray curl behind her ear and tried not to let the tears creak down her cheeks. Brushing a hand solemnly down the white dress, she smiled, but it was only one full of sadness.

Holding up the hem of the dress, and walked barefoot across the garden, stopping by the same table and chair. It was an old one, bought at a car-boot sale in her childhood, and it had once been pristine and white. Now its lattice frame was rusted with fraying paint. Putting a hand to it, she sat down, raised one leg up to her chin. When she was smaller she was able to fit both feet on it, but now she struggled to manage this. She had grown and the world had changed.

Looking across the garden she felt another well up in her eye. Breathing deeply, she begged the tears to go away. The garden had been decorated beautifully, and looked too happy a place for someone to be crying in it.

Everyone had chipped in for the impromptu celebration, and mismatched tables and flowers and strung-up lights had been draped every corner of the yard. It was terribly random, and all over the place, but it was perfect.

Her parents would've loved to see their garden like this.

A leaf floated down and she brushed it off her mother's dress. It was oversized, she hadn't gained her mother's tall and graceful figure, but a neighbour had done the best they could to get it to fit her. Some of the lace had stained with time, but she savoured each mark like a memory.

Looking back towards the house, she saw a young man walking towards her. 

"Hey hun," he said as he got closer and touched her arm.

"Hi."

He smiled, happier than her smile, but still bittersweet. 

"Are you doing alright?"

She nodded, not sure if she could say anything.

"They've done an amazing job with the yard, it looks magical," he said.

"It's perfect," she tells him. Looking up at his face, you smile. For so long things had been imperfect, but now for a moment, they didn't have to be.

A gust of wind comes and she shook her head.

"I'm going to miss the house," she told him.

He knelt down to her level and took her hand.

"We can stay here."

Shaking her head quickly sniffed. "You know we need the money and," she smiled. "Someone will move in here, a family maybe, and there'll be laughter again."

She knew he wanted to make her happy, to give her everything she needed. Moving would break his heart just as much as it would hers, but she couldn't live here anymore. They both knew the money was barely an issue, and more of an excuse.

Rubbing her back, he smiled bravely.

"There will be a lovely family, who will spend all their days playing and running and laughing in this home."

She nodded, it made her happier knowing that. 

"Mum and Dad would be happy to know that," she said softly.

"I have a present for you," he said suddenly, pulling something he had been hiding behind his back.

She took the pot from him, resting it on the small table.

"A plant?"

"An apple tree."

She faltered for a moment, staring at the plant that still sat between her fingers. She remembered the plant that had sat dying in the garden, waiting to be planted without knowing that no one ever would. Finally, as she held let the frayed leaves crumple in her hand, she knew that apple tree would never live again.

"I thought we could plant it for the new family."

She couldn't hold the tears back any longer. Letting the coldness slip down her cheeks, she fingered the bright, fresh leaves of the tree. Feeling the strong arms around her, she remembered the arms that once held her as she danced in the air as a child, and the love that had been poured into her heart.

Wiping back a tear, she smiled, and though it was full of sadness, it was full of happiness too.

"You know," she said. "It's bad luck to see a bride before her wedding."

Patting her hand he got up from the ground.

"I'll see you down the aisle then." Giving her a last smile, he walked back towards the house.

Touching a leaf of the apple tree, she pushed herself up from the chair. Leaving it on the table in the sun, she promised they'd plant it together later. Maybe it would grow big and strong and a child would play in its leaves. That's all she wanted.

Returning to the house, she paused to look back at the decorated garden. They had sold the house in a sudden, and she had realised that there was one more thing she needed to do before they left.  She had grown up here, and spent days running through the house and garden as if she never had to grow up. Though she didn't want to believe it, she had to. Tomorrow the house would be packed up, and they would be moving on to another part of their lives. 

She couldn't live in her family home without a family.

She was ready to leave, but she just needed to do one more thing so she could say goodbye; she needed to start her new life.

Running her hand across the white dress, she looked up to the sky and smiled at her parents. They would be happy.

Taking a last glance across the yard, she spied the apple tree sitting on the table. Even if she was gone, the tree would remain, and a new family would come and make memories of their own in it. That was all she wanted, all her parents would've wanted.

"I love you," she spoke softly, and she felt the wind carry it upwards.

Giving a smile, she turned away from the yard and walked back into the house. Soon she'd be married in her childhood home, and she knew that there was no better way to say goodbye to everything she had lost, but also to move forward in everything that was to come. 

Leaving the house would break her heart, but there was someone there to make it whole again. 

Reviews

[barleygirl]

This is a thoughtful story that blends a wide variety of emotions, which is authentic for a pre-wedding scene of sadness/happiness. I get so tired of love stories where everything is described as perfect, that's why I love your description of the yard being perfect even tho a hodge podge of borrowed things. This is what authentic writing feels like . . . this is what real lives feel like . . . contrasts & a scramble of responses to any given thing that happens (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Archia]

I'm so glad you enjoyed this. I did want to try and show something that was perfect in it's own right, not just unrealistically perfect. Thank you so much for reading