Vertigo

We cannot be friends.

You are too lovely

so sorry but as I will not

lie politely in your bed

spooning inpalpability

nor sit beside you

on the couch

night after night

warming cold shoulders on

smouldering resentment

as our eyes see not the tv

but the disappointment

sat between us

like an uninvited guest

 

I cannot be your friend.

 

Did I mention your eyes?

how they give me vertigo

Reviews

[R J Askew]

Nice one. The title intrigued and the poem surprised, twice, in its setting and, especially, in its delightful ending which turns everything on its head. It captures the post-passion reality and then plunges back into the passion at the end. Great stuff. And behind it all is the tormenting question of how exactly do we live with passion and its aftermath. Can a fire be kept blazing? Are such fires supposed to blaze on and on? Or is love over in a blink which leaves us dumbfounded as we stumble around in reality for another N decades.

[Brjden (Bridge-Den) Cre..]

Ah, how we've all lived this nightmare. I'm getting vertigo just thinking about it! This was a very intelligent, entertaining write about something that I have lots of experience with; the gray "friend zone" area. Not sure what the other person is thinking. Developing feelings only having them not returned, etc. You use great visuals and words to describe the situation perfectly.

"so sorry but as I will not
lie politely in your bed
spooning inpalpability
nor sit beside you
on the couch
night after night
warming cold shoulders on
smouldering resentment
as our eyes see not the tv
but the disappointment
sat between us
like an uninvited guest"

Cutting your loses(as the subject does here), is probably best. Though it's so common for people to take the ladder and be that uninvited guest on the couch and the uncomfortable feeling that lingers. **Sigh**
Great piece April......

[Pax Analog]

Ah, excellent contrast between the usually implied "safe" middle-ground of friendship, and the hi-wire act of passionate overdrive.

All or nothing.

This is love's wisdom. We are not "safe." We die. Live on fire -- it is both the fullest presence NOW, and the only way to personally discover the MORE of transcendence.

Vertigo in the vortex of radical being -- love-desire is the entry to divinity.

[Anarda Nashai]

Very frank...and full of human nature. Written plainly, and still with all the quality and substance of most brilliant writes. I LOVE THIS!!!

-Anarda Nashai
author of Despondent
Check out my website at:
www.anardanashai.webs.com!

[SPINNING ON that dizzy ..]

I like the dance of this..... when things are over, they are over....mostly..... To make us question when we are not the questioning type....to make us evaluate and re-evaluate and second guess.... nope, not your style.... but then does that mean that this person that makes us feel this way... has more power than we want them to have...... damn......

good write

this would be great read aloud.....

Kath

[J.P.O.et]

Short, concise, and absolutely honest piece. I think everyone can relate to this piece in some
fashion and the abrupt ending was just so perfect as a likeness to how the relationship had to
end.
'Warming cold shoulders
on smouldering resentment'
Great lines and the 'spooning inpalpability' just struck me as a brilliant line that makes the reader
think deeper.
'Did I mention your eyes?
how they give me vertigo'
Nice write indeed!!!

J.P.O.et

[PianoandPage]

i love this poem. there are those people around us, the attraction, the magnetic IS of them is too much for friendship.

you describe it so perfectly here.

i have to agree with angel's lady. the disappointment line really blew me away. that's original and powerful.

you have such talent. not only to turn a over done poem on it's head but to also deliver a sincere and romantic ending without turning to mush-ville.

[Larissa G.]

I feel your frustration in this very well.
I love the couch scene as well.
I'm a little tired so I don't have much more to add; but I truly enjoyed this and thank you for sharing it. :)

[Forest Green]

A true zinger at the end...zeroing in on a palpable weakness.

Very nice...honest and revealing.

Good work...!

[Angel's Lady]

but the disappointment
sat between us
like an uninvited guest ---- WOW. Now, there's a line you can feel like the lines on corduroy!

This is a longing, yearning piece, full of want and angst, but very beautifully written, each line painting a particuar picture. Nicely done, April! You could make me dizzy any day! haha