Into Love's Light Beam

First attempt at a sonnet, A petrarchan

Your plaintive tears fall unstemmed from my eyes

my heart wears bloody bruises of your heart

my hand seeks to offer strength in its grasp

I walk beside you though my step is shy

your sorrow has no need to be asked why

who, when, how or truly what is the source  

it will in its own time take its due course

I cannot take it from you though I try

kiss closed your eyes that you escape to dream

whispering gift words to nourish your soul

courage, strength, hope and faith offer healing

hold up your head, look towards love’s light beam

though now broken you will be again whole

loving and giving, living and feeling.

Reviews

[An owl on the moon]

Absolutely stunning beauty! Words as soft as clouds drifting over the reader, guiding us into the most tender part of your soul... Wonderful!

[Murphy]

Very smooth... I like the way it flows... a very effective and smooth transition. Great job; I look forward to reading more sonnets in the future!

[Sean M. Addams]

very well written ... very powerful read.

[R J Askew]

Petrach would applaud! It feels timeless and 'sounds' like a sonnet being about sadness and hope in love. Tears, eyes, heart, heart, hand, grasp, walk give a physical feel early on then at the end it becomes loftier as you try and rally the bruised lover. Courage, strenght, hope and faith all seem 'right' for this type of poem. They give a heroic feel. Personally i also like the word nourish. And each line is ten syllables. The word beam in the headline and body of the poem seems the most active invocation.

[Ismael Rodriguez Jr.]

deep insightful poem

[__Flaw__]

Your plaintive tears....hmm....instead of plaintive, you could say...sorrowful, or sad, not rueful... plaintive seems a bit of... inspiring pity, instead of just being plain sad or shattered. I guess.

And whispering Gift words....omit the gift....whispering words to nourish your soul....perfect. (These are just my thoughts...nothing more)

Hmm...i should say...you have some selection of words...powerful and engaging at the same time...Fabulouse. I guess the challange has been sincerely accomplished. This was damn good.

Adios.

[V. K. Harris]

Very Deep Lovely Write.

[Tbird]

This was absolutely beautiful I wrote something almost identical to this just moments ago LOL
Kinda creepy hehe, Well it was beautiful how painful it starts and warm it ends. Like life its worth fighting for. Read my The Darkest Night if you get a chance you might get creeped out how similar they are.
Thank you for sharing this

[Captain Blackheart (The..]

I love the feel of this piece. Something about it when I read it......Its wonderful (maybe I should try a sonnet). I loved the title - Into love's light beam. Give me a warm feeling inside :)

You should definatly try more sonnets........EXCELLENT!!!