Nameless Monster

I wish I was schizophrenic.

The voices are real, they aren’t from inside.

They hide behind walls and around corners.

They come from my friends and family.

 

I wish I was schizophrenic, then the words wouldn’t be true.

Then they would just be a part of me.

Then I could understand why they say what they say.

I wouldn’t have the choice to hum them out.

To rock back and forth with fingers plugging my ears.

To turn on the music, the white noise, the fan.

 

The sounds cripple me

The words chip away at me.

The feelings can’t be controlled.

I know it’s not real, I know I’m not hearing it, I know no one’s talking about me.

I wish I was schizophrenic.

 

If I was schizophrenic I could put a name to the monster.

I would know what’s wrong.

I could take a pill to kill the feelings.

 

I wish I knew the monster’s name.

Reviews

[Taino]

Very profound. It drew me into your words. I put myself into your poem as I read it and reread it, and I was consumed by the strength & power that spoken words can have. I asked myself if there was any truth to what is being said or my translation of the words. Very powerful poem.

[Tom Bombidail]

Thank you. It's what I deal with every day. Sometimes I need to get it out or it'll consume me.

[Taino]

You are an amazing writer. It's very personal piece.