The weight of joy

In pensive thought, I listen and I learn,
Happiness comes, and yet I soon return

To the bell that rings for duties, rest, and prayer,
I try to heed it, but forget, unaware.

The music plays, lyrics, tunes I deeply feel,
Longing and emotive, away from quick appeal.

Disquiet seems the natural state for me,
Not parties or treats, but quiet's where I’ll be.

Melancholy fills me when my loved ones cry,
When I’m carefree, their pain I felt I deny.

I quietly search for ways to ease their pain,
But joy feels selfish when their hurt remains.

The weight of joy