The demons that I hide

This poem is about my struggle to cope with what happened to me as a child. I wrote it to try and help me get some closure.

My hatred for you is not unjust

But I've kept it inside and I'm about to combust

You were never a mother nor did you care

All you were was selfish and it's not fair



You ruined the life

Of your child to little to fight

Instead of giving me love You gave me fear

Instead of hugs i had tears



Your selfishness and lack of care

Forced me to mature beyond my years

Sleepless nights full of fright

Should have been sleepover's and pillow fights



Did you honestly think that I didn't see

All the things you choose over me

You would rather be high

then stop your daughters cries



You didn't want me you wanted to be free

But what the heck it got you a check

You didn't care that I lived it fear

Cause after all you had your beer



For all my life I've had to fight

Because of you I lost my light

You gave me nightmares, Demons and fear

My question for you is did you ever care



Did you care that I saw everything you did

Or that I had to watch Aaliyah as kid

Cause you never cared

So young yet I had a heavy cross to bear



Why didn't you ever do what was right

Why did you continue fight

Instead of letting me have a good life

Your selfishness had reached new heights



My biggest fear is being like you

selfish,crude, and a bad mother too

I don't want to cause people pain

For my own selfish gain



The achievements I've made

And all the times I've been strong and brave

Were in spite of you

And all you put me through



After all these years I still have that cross to bear

Even though I doubt you care

There is one thing you got me to see

exactly who I don't want to be





















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Author's Note

This is my first poem I apologize for any incorrect grammar or anything. I hope you enjoy please leave me your thoughts.