Dear God

A song I wrote about a girl who's in love with her next door neighbor. Extra points if you can guess who's eye it is! Just kidding :)

Dear God

I’m still afraid of heights

I’m not in Kansas anymore

 

Dear God

Tall, dark, and handsome

Eyes of chocolate stone and a voice to match

Tell me it’s just a dream

 

If I could wish on a star

I would wish for him

Anything about him

Everything about him

Yet nothing about him at all

I would wish he was mine

 

Dear God

I’m still in love with that boy

I wish that you would tell him

Because I’m too scared to tell him myself

How am I supposed to ask him anything if he’s always somewhere else

 

Dear God

I wrote this song today

To tell you that all the rumors are true

I’m head over heels for this dark – haired wonder

And he doesn’t even know it yet

 

If I could wish on a star

I would wish for him

Anything about him

Everything about him

Yet nothing about him at all

I would wish he was mine

 

He’s not going to listen

He’s not going to care

I just want to touch him once

And see if I feel the same tingle

That I do when I see him

Or hear him

Or even hear his name

 

If I could wish upon a shooting star

I would wish for the boy next door

The boy next door that I’m in love with

Anything about the boy next door

Everything about the boy next door

Yet nothing about him at all

I would wish the boy next door was mine

 

Dear God

He has chocolate brown eyes

Raven black hair

A perfect grin

I wonder if he can hear me right now

Because if he could that would mean that I might win

But winners never cheat

And cheaters never win

So Dear God

I think I can do this myself

Author's Note

I'd really like it if people told me the problems they had with it, not just an "It sucks!" Constructive critisism is really good for better writing.

Reviews

[John Stussy]

Really direct, but delicately put. Good song here, I could kind of hear a melody in my head, don't know if it was the same as the one you intended it to be, but it sounded great. I really liked the last stanza, about winners never cheating and cheaters never winning. It was an effective way to end the song.

[Baby Boy]

I had no problem with this at all! It was very interesting and uniquely written and I so happened to love it! :) Great write Miss Annica and I hope you get that wish! :) One luv sweetie!


-JC-

[Jabez]

haha! cute! =)

[MARZ]

really the only thing i have a problem with is the length. i started off grabbed but the hook faded and left me wanting. maybe if you described specifically something he did...his actions...something that says he's next door instead of telling us he's next door? like how you look forward to getting the mail at the same time...or taking out the trash...or maybe how you intentionally put your mail in his box so he has to come over...something of that ilk, you get what i mean? but it's good, though, don't put yourself down

forMARZly yours

[forfila]

I love it, straight direct honest and risk taking,,, I will say that I love it again

Nice poem Annica =)

Love from
Me