INTERNET LOVE

They met...

Sitting in front of the computer desk, Angevin was shedding tears due to the fact her so called 'long lost love' would never return. She sat there until afternoon. 

          

        ''Where is he?'' she said impatiently waiting for an MSN from him. Thousands of worried thoughts piled into her mind. Her feelings for Kemal, six years older than her age, cannot be explained. Three weeks earlier when her friend, Gabby knew about the guy she thought it was ridiculous.

   ''But you've never met him Angevin !'' Gabby said.

    ''I know... but I love him.'' She said with a perplexed face.

    ''What if he's not real?''

     ''I'm sure he's real. ''Gosh! You're really not supportive.''

    ''Supportive?'' Gabby said infuriatedly.'' That's not the point!

 

Angevin looked at her in disgust. She always thought that a friend was meant to help and support each other no matter what.

      ''All am saying Angevin is that you've never seen him.'' Gently touching her shoulder, she said, ''I understand that you love him, but what if he breaks your heart?''  Am only trying to save you from being miserable.

            

               ''I'm not... am happy being with him,  Angevin said with conviction.

                ''Okay, if you say so.'' Gabby said suspiciously. Just remember that I'm here, but you also have to decide for yourself afterall he's six thousand miles away.

After recalling the conversation she had with Gabby, she sat there feeling ashamed of what she had said to her. She realised that Gabby was right and had tried to give her advice. Instead,  Angevin did not give the green light to her friend and she now has to face the consequences of being alone.

      Without warning,Angevin received a friend request on her other social networking site. She had no idea who the person was and so she send him a message.

 

                  ''Do I know you?'' she typed hastily

                  ''No just a random add.'' Hope you don't mind? he said with confidence as if nothing was wrong in adding a stranger from the web!

                 ''guess not?''  She replied.

As a month passed by, Angevin and Sammie kept talking. They were having an enjoyable conversation. All at once, he asked Angevin if she will go out with him.

                    

               ''Why me?'' She asked quickly. At the same time, she recollected what Gabby said to her. Angevin had to decide and not being observant, she was scared that she would make the same mistake again like she did with Kemal. Angevin felt that she was cheating on Kemal because deep down in her heart she knew that Kemal will come back.

                     ''No, I don't think it's a good idea.'' she said 

                       ''why not?'' he asked curiously  I'm getting to like you.

                       ''like me?'' You don't even know me yet! she said angrily.

                        ''Well... tell me more about yourself.'' Sammie asked in a polite tone to make Angevin give in. She then started to type a paragraph and each day, they were getting closer to each other. However, at the same time, Angevin felt it was  inappropriate to date someone again over the web and so she decided to keep it a secret from Gabby.

                    ''Gabby will be so disappointment in me.'' she said under her breath.She will then know how foolish i am.Saturday morning,Angevin went online and saw a message from Sammie.

                 ''Will you still go out with me?'' It said on his chat.

She knew she had to think fast. After knowing him for 5 months, she then made a choice. 

                ''yes i will go out with you.'' She said. The five feet three inches tall,19 year old girl was sparkling with green hazled eyes. Her long black hair reflected on the computer screen as she looked fixedly at the conversation. She felt as if she was on the edge of the cliff, but enthusiastic at the same time. They both were being entertained by each others company. The first eight months being together,bloomed. Unfortunately, Angevin realised that Sammie was cheating on her or possibly telling lies of how much he loved her and wanted to make her his own. Even though she was very close to his friends,it felt as if he didn't wanted her. He gradually stopped spending time with her and took ages to reply to her messages. 

                  Late Friday night, she asked Sammie why he didn't reply to her messages. She saw that he had seen her inbox, but haven't replied. It then made her think that he was talking to someone else --- perhaps some other girl. That night, Angevin felt heart broken and cried herself to sleep. The next morning, a message from Sammie came through.

            

              ''Hey darling, I'm sorry i haven't replied yesterday night.'' I came home from work and I was very exhausted. 

                 ''So you didn't care to reply me back?'' she asked bitterly 

                  ''I do care, i was too tired and i hadn't eaten much that night.'' he said. Please try to understand me.

                     ''K.''Angevin said with a don't care attitude.

                     ''Comon!''.... ''K'?'' He said, trying to figure out what she meant by that.

                      ''Can't you not read?'' And I know that you were cheating on me!

                     ''What?!'' '' I don't understand what you're talking about Angevin.'' 

                  ''Oh you do know!'' she said getting all defensive. You saw my message and then you took very long to go offline again!

                    ''No! No!'' You're mistaken, I already told you in our previous conversation that i Have limited access to the WiFi.'' It goes very slow, that it takes a bit longer to log me out.

                        '' I don't believe you.'' She said

                          ''You need to trust me.'' He said to her convincingly.

                           ''How?'' When it's very clear that it's not believable enough!

                            

Angevin and Sammie stopped talking that whole day. That same evening, Gabby called Angevin.

                             ''Hey!'' 'How are ya?'' Gabby asked 

                              ''I'm fine...'' She said quietly 

                                ''Cool... so how's that guy of yours?''

                                 ''Uhhm.. well it's over.. i think it is.''

                                  ''Oh.. you think?'' What happened?  

''He wasn't online and i waited for a month to receive is message,but there wasn't any reply.''

                            ''Right, I see.''  Gabby said thoughtfully. 

                     ''You think he went with some other girl?''

                        '' That might be the case....'' Angevin said. 

    ''Oh...okay''. Gabby said ''So you're not dating anyone at the moment?' 

 ''Nope.. I'm not''Angevin said hoping that she didn't sound too obvious that she was.

                                   ''Awrighty!'' Gabby said with satisfaction that she had helped her close friend from being heartbroken. Well, I gotta go now, bye.

                                        [       Phone Beeps ] 

Angevin thought that lieing to Gabby was going to get her into serious trouble. She decided that she would have to tell her,but when?  Monday morning, she went to colledge thinking about what had happened to her and Sammie. Feelings of doubt scattered her innocent heart, wondering if he was 'the one'.  The Thought of being with him was magical, yet sensed  it was fake. She couldn't follow why she kept thinking about him when she haven't seen him face to face.The argument she had with Sammie, she couldn't seem to forget and that made her failed most of her exams. Late Wednesday night,she received a message from Kemal. The one who she didn't hear over two months ago.

                                 

                               ''Hi Kemal!'' Angevin said excitedly 

                               ''How are you?'' He said in a down cast tone.

       ''I'm okay... Where were you?'' She asked worriedly because of the way he suddenly stopped talking to her.

        ''I'm sorry, i was so busy with my schooling.'' He said. As you know i'm studying physiology and it's a lot of work.''

        ''I thought you cheated on me so i left.'' she said in self- disgust because it was now her fault because she cannot go back to him. Even though Angevin still has feelings for him; and as the result of having someone else in her life, there was no way she will get a second chance.

                         ''My dear, i didn't cheat on you.''

When Angevin seen this message she exploded into tears. Her heart was smashed in anger. She knew she had lost him and will never love like she did with Kemal

                            ''Why didn't you tell me!'' she cried. You could've message me! 

''Yes I know my love, but i was in the state of being stressed and had to take my exams.''

                              ''Okay.'' she said

                             ''I presume you have someone already.'' He said

                             ''Yes... because I thought you weren't coming back.''

                              ''I'm sorry dear,but i wish you all the best.''

                              ''Thank you.''

                              ''I'm always here if you need to talk.''

                               ''i know.''

That night, she engrossed herself into who she really wanted.Sammie or Kemal? It certainly didn't made sense to me so why did it to her? Angevin and Sammie were always arguing and pointing fingers at each other of who did what. They never got along just like Tom and Jerry! Even though Angevin was the most loyal girl and gave everything she had to Sammie she still felt that being with him was going to end up a frightful sight especially for her. Each day, she saw Sammie doing nothing to show his love. Feeling destroyed and used, she still stayed pretending to be happy. What else she could've done? She love him so much that leaving was not going to be such a favorable idea, but she had no choice. Saturday afternoon,Angevin called him.

                                ''Hello?'' 

                                 ''I'm leaving,'' she said.

                                  ''Hey what do you mean by that?''

                                 ''I said i'm leaving... this relationship.''

                                 ''I don't want to hear that!.'' Sammie said madly.

                                 ''Well you just did!'' You're treating me as if i'm nothing to you.

                                  ''You wanna leave after a whole year?!''

                                   ''Yes.''

Angevin cried, she needed her freedom from all the agony that Sammie gave. There was no way she can trust him. Somehow or another she wanted to stay,but the more she did she will not find happiness. After that she hung up the phone and never wanted to talk to him again. She felt a peace of mind and did everything she wanted to do. Never before she had felt loving herself and painting a smile on her face. Her life was the way it should be. Free, filled with positive emotions and most importantly independence.