Happy Birthday My Baby Hope

Tomorrow My Dear Sweet beautiful Daughter will be 15...along with HopeRayna...Her twin, my treasured FaithMaria as well. This is a hard time for me. to celebrate ones life with-out the other. HURTS

 















Our minds have a way of knowing,
Sometimes we forget for very good reasons,
When we've humbly hit,
our very own "mental over load".
Memories often come,
and shall soon fade away,
Before the dawn of a brand new day.
Waking from sleep,
Alarmed and confused,
Knowing in your heart,
It's all about to start!

The absence and longing felt,
digging deeper in my heart.
Everyday ripping into my ribs,
nesting inside my chest.
I feel great confusion,
Making me so damn irate.
Asking God Almighty,
"Why didn't you take me instead?"
This is way too early,
to soon for her departure.
I'm down on my knees sobbing,
while silently praying.

Asking from despair,
"Please God,show me the way?"
To find comfort and peace,
deep inside this needy heart
This badly tattered and torn body,
that's started hating everything!

Please fill part or all,
where I'm cracked and badly scratched up.
My senses are slowly caving in,
crashing a Mommies last reason
If only you'd give me an answer
as to "Why the hell not me instead?"
I'd let you come this very moment,
to take me before I drown in misery!

Shouting my prayers today from 
deep within whats left of me....
"God why won't you show me a way
to go on or point me toward recovery?
If only You'd tell me,
"Why wasn't I the one violently
whisked away instead of my Hope?"

I'm ready to give up on waiting,
I'm so lost in a much needier way.

I wish this pain and all to end soon!
I am blindly falling, always face down.

In an anger like way I say,
"Find me soon before it's to late,
before my soul never gets
to know how to rest!

Either come now to stop this bleeding,
before my good heart truly dies.

I'm finally finished weeping now,
I'm ready to peacefully sleep.

Her aching heart and head are down,
upon a soft bed of fresh roses.

Her eyes are shut no more fearing sleep,
shes welcoming a deep release.

For the love and Faithful Memories of,
my beautiful daughter Hope.

Never forget or let go of her smile, 
nor let her laughter fade away.

Always remind people who held her,
how much her scent still lingers.

Of The love she had in Her heart
forever beautiful and young!

Eternally brave and little,
beating on and forever strong ...

A Mother truly is always, her child's only keeper.
Of the many things best kept, and wept over.

All the secrets a mother and child make
for many years to share and declare!

Never to be misplaced nor treated,
as if she's walking off past those times!

In those moments tucked away,
stowed in the places only a mommy knows.

In only a part of her most graceful place,
nestled in that space, with her special child.

A mothers best ever secret maker,
FOREVER the keeper of her heart!!

Reviews

[Ron Braley]

Very sweet and touching. I am always amazed at how easily you can share your in heart in words and actions everyday. Keep it up!