Chapter three

Dear everlasting fantasy .

I should be asking  how are you , telling you  I'm fine , do the fair to the regular structure of a letter . But what's the point ? you won't answer and I am not even close to fine .

 

I can't deal with your constant ignorance, please tell me I'm not as forgettable as your silence is  making me feel .

 The possibility that you're not receiving any of my letters  is my only reassurance .

I am drunk in thoughts about you . Your voice haunts me , as I feel your hands surrounding me , and I breath in your smell . 

 I don’t want to loose you .

My frien.. were you ever mine ?

Were we friends ? lovers ?

What were we ?

Who are you ?

Who am I ?

Do we even exist ?

Do you even care ?

We are the winded bodies and lost souls , drowning in the sea of words , we are the whisper of the forgotten shadows those that clime up to my wall , when the candle light burned me and you laughed . Do you remember ?

 how can you remember , you  weren't there  .

Were you ever there ?

I’d like to believe so .

Forgive me . forgive the poor heart that felt for you .

Forgive the tortured soul , The unloved one .

Thoughts in my mind are all screaming at once  , shouting for attention .

I can’t sleep .

 Nor wake up .

Breathing hurts .

I don’t feel like myself anymore . However , my suffering comforts me . 

Perhaps if you weren’t miles away , you could have loved me back .

Cared more .

You said that what we had isn’t true , isn’t real . Isn't it ? real  : existing or occurring as fact; actual rather than imaginary, ideal, or fictitious . I recall every breath you took , every inch of your fainted body and that is real enough for me . 

Send me a letter please , or call me , say something evil . Say you hate me , So I’d hate you .

This is torturous , no one ever said how painful it can be , no one managed to give it a proper description , No one can .

Please  , release me from my pain .

I don’t want to love you .

The more I miss you, the more it hurts .

In the Darkness , I found our shadows , I heard them whispering , Couldn’t understand their murmurs . yet , they seemed happy .

I miss you .

your absence left a dark hole in me .

I don't miss you , I love you despretly and insanly .

hope you remain forever true .

yours 

Ana .

Reviews

[Echoes of Eros]

You dive so deep into the painful ache of loving, of living in the darkness of love's lingering. How your words make me miss this presence too. xo

[Hakim]

interesting read. I thought this was going to be a story/novel though. well written