Waterfront at Daybreak

 

Crossing the bay, a boat

with faded paint, salt-scalded

and peeling, meets the morning,

lit by the long legs of the sun

stepping slowly across

the quietly rippling water.

 

Seabirds swim through the air,

dipping and diving, following

the fishermen’s wake, like children

fighting for the last piece of sweets;

one steals a bit of fish from

the bait basket and disappears,

another moves in to take it’s place.

 

Along the dock lines, my footsteps

leave no trace on the weathered wood,

covered in the oils of fish innards

and glistening scales, and I breathe

deeply of the heady scent

that belongs only to this place,

strangely comforting, oddly consoling.

Reviews

[KUFU]

You ended with:

"strangely comforting, oddly consoling."

...I feel the same about this work. You describe well the happenings of a busy waterfront. Having lived in two waterfront communities myself, I can really identify with this piece. There is something oddly consoling about watching fishermen butcher their catch. I guess this speaks to man's primal need to hunt and gather; this makes the most sense to me, these visions all absorbed through the spiked sea air does offer a heady rush. Unfortunately for me, in one of these communities I lived in, the oil tankers would funk up usually pleasant scents from the bay. But as I say, as you state in your piece, it was, 'strangely comforting, oddly consoling.' knowing that I would be able to gas-up my car because of those tankers.
On a deeper level, I feel this work contains archetypes of the life and death struggles of consciousness and reality. Reality in the sense that:

" Along the dock lines, my footsteps
leave no trace on the weathered wood,
covered in the oils of fish innards..."

...weathering intimates a wearing down of a thing/concept. Fish innards intimate a bit of gore. All this amidst footsteps that have no meaning...hmmm, interesting. A reflection of ones sense or need to be relevant and contemplations of the effects of irrelevancy upon ones life/reality? And all these machinations are contemplated at daybreak down by the waterfront...Sun beginning/opening another day anew...deeply effective and critical for an observant conscience.
Really feelin the depth of this piece beyond the surface. I'm not sure if I get the tone of this piece, but I imagined it to be quiet, smooth and contemplative.

[Michael X]

This is indeed, strangely, yet depthfully comforting and vividly transposing,
well written, and beautifully expressed, reminds me of looking into a painting.
The title is perfect, your creativity is a pleasure to read.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

First off you really painted the scene nicely with your words, though in black and white everything was in full color... I love the ending as you so beautifully put your feelings into motion... so true how we can find comfort in place we should feel out of place... I guess it's cause we can feel more free for a while and imagine endless possibilities when we step outside our comfort zone.

[[untitled]]

I love this piece, especially the first stanza. The imagery of the boat is vivid, and the way you anthropomorphize the sun stealing over the water's surface is priceless. It's like the one way that you wouldn't expect the sun's light to be described...yet you have found it. And the likening of the sea birds to children in the second stanza is another fine example of finding the one description that is perfect. That's perhaps the one single greatest thing that I love about your poetry the most - the way you make the most base or uninteresting things and make them interesting and romantic.
I don't know why, but I don't care so much for the "fish innards" of the third stanza...methinks it's because everything in the poem before and after that is so beautifully worded, providing such a pristine image of pretty visions that that line seems out of place. But that's just me. It just seemed like something that broke the mood and feeling.
But, me likes this one very much. =)

[Scott H.]

Another great piece!

The imagery you use really makes the waterfront scene come alive and seem vibrant.

For some reason, I really like the line 'covered in the oils of fish innards and glistening scales'