Surrender

 

Float with me upon these seas,

where beneath the shallow surface

the many dimensions of my yearning

are glistening stones, soft and smooth,

waiting to be rescued. 

 

Untie me with your truths,

untangle the manifestation

of this unrelenting desire

so that once again my body

may experience that sweet release

that comes only when our two souls meet.

 

Tell to me your secrets

so that I may share your dreams,

roam freely through the mists

that keep hidden your promises

and imprison your waiting heart.

Reviews

[The Xi of Nothing]

Wow, very pleasant imagery. What of the stones? I'm curious about their symbolism. Great work!

[bluessadmood]

yes lets float upon seas together ,you will find under the surface,many dimensions of my yearning waiting for you,unravel to me and open up so my body once again see a sweet release,that comes only when we mate,what beauty what wonderful emotions i stand speechless...

[Don Coorough]

The sweetest surrender, the surrender to soul mating. Beautiful.

[Loribeth215]

Oooooooh.... beautiful!!!

[Gandré]

Tell to me your secrets so that I may share your dreams, ------------I loved those lines for they are so pure and innocent, this is true love when we have desire to please the other person. this poem nourishes people who are hungry for sacred way of living in a relationship full of honest magic moments, only true love can offer them. each word was vivid and dynamic and contributes to the whole picture. Loved it !!!

[Lori]

Very sensual imagery throughout the poem, and it's all very beautiful. It manages to be open and mysterious at the same time.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Wow such an outstanding and beautiful write... it shows that the truest love will not only hold you tight but will also allow you to be yourself... This is going in my favs.

[KUFU]

This is a beautiful poem no doubt, but I think when presented with straight talk most people find it difficult to allow themselves to be so vulnerable as to:

"Tell to me your secrets"

...as you so "honestly" write. Honesty is in so short supply these days...and then to reveal an honest secret about oneself is certainly asking for trouble...one way or the other.
The essence of this poem is that of trust. You narrate your willingness to "bare all...so there's no deception", this is a difficult proposition for the cynic to navigate, but to the poet it is evidence of transcendence...if the words spoken are true.
Trust...hmmm...the ultimate arbiter of man and demon in my opinion.

[Panda]

The imagery in this poem touched me, I enjoyed reading this very much. My favorite part would be: "Tell to me your secrets so that I may share your dreams"

You did a great job of explaining desire, lust, sex, and ectasy of two souls. I liked this piece :D.

[[untitled]]

Yes, this poem has already earned a place in my favorites. There it will be at the top for me to read constantly, and for others to read if they visit my profile. This one reads complete enough, I would say leave it, but I know that if you feel that it is unfinished, you will only wow me with whatever additions you make to it. You seem to have that talent for making even better which seemingly cannot be made better.