Lived,Died,Returned,Then Vanished

Just a little something to kick off with

I wish there was a remedy 

Away to somehow 

Switch over to another life

This one here I only seem

To be messing up more and more

I'm not sure how to maintain anything

My health, behavior, hygiene, my relationship, money

I just feel like every decision I make 

End's up with a disaster at the end

Some sort of sick joke really 

A way to punish me for my last bad decision 

I just add another one onto the stack

The sad part is I don't know how to stop

I wish I knew

Really I do 

I feel out of control