Grips of Depression

I wrote this thinking of anyone - and especially a very good friend of mine - who has ever experienced depression.

Beneath a dull, greying sky

I lay, and I watch -

You stand upon hard earth

With your outstretched arms,

Beckoning me close.

Within your eyes - 

Resides a coldness, and I dare say - 

Belies a desperation, 

A vanity that encloses the heart.

Your face is a scarred mass of distrust,

And you're twisted and crippled

Yet, you've lived on -

In an endless parade of insanity.

Author's Note

There might be a few people that are confused by the meaning of
"A vanity that encloses the heart."

It's there to express that feeling of refusing others, and only wanting to be on your own.

Reviews

[lua]

this is an interesting representation of depression, an anthropomorphised being external to one's self - creative and somewhat comforting

[marcus]

Again, I really like your style! But I also must say, as someone who has experienced depression, first and second hand, something about it doesn't quite ring true. Why a vanity enclosing the heart? Is it written from the perspective of the depressed person, or their friend?

[just another mac withou..]

yeah, know this poem too well... it is very well written with a very strong style and an obvious knowledge of the content. excellent

[Devons]

You know, I read this as a personification of depression - as if it were some spirit or beast lurking in the shadows, waiting. Perhaps that was your intention, but either way it certainly works very well in that sense. It's an unconventional depiction and that definitely makes it interesting - I mean to say, most, if not all, writing on this subject tends to be very personal, direct from the horse's mouth, as it were. This is much the more objective, and I think it is at least equally, if not more effective than most of the related poems I've read. But then I think most people should personally have experienced something of depression in some way, if even small (though it is relative). Either way, it takes imagination to write about it well, and you have succeeded in that respect. The last line is quite a telling one.

[Kelsey Schadt]

Such an intense piece of writing! It is clear that you carefully consider each word you choose for utmost impact. Because that is obvious, in the line, "You stand there on hard earth" the word "there" doesn't seem as precise as the rest of your language. Perhaps consider a stronger word? Well written.

[Bare trees]

This is an excellent way of describing depression though some may disagree. They may look at it as a sickness that won't go away, hence the cutting and seclusion. I do think this is a great poem though.You have a good handle on diction in your writing.