Reckless Abandon

So I like to linger around the “unreviewed” section of this universe and this has been on the list for forever. I finally gave in to my curiosity and clicked in. I was more than a little shocked to find that it had reviews. I’m guessing this is another glitch of the site since it’s not being maintained. Hopefully a more recent date will allow actually unreviewed things to come to the top since this has actually received feedback.
Also, unfortunately, this no longer has any content so this is nothing left to comment on.

Posted 1 Month Ago

I read the prologue and first part of your story and I'm going to say this. This is only one person's opinion and honestly it means nothing. You are a writer..I am a writer. Everything we write is subject to praise and criticism. In the end none of that matters.

With that said. I was impressed. For a 19 year old you have very good story telling skills. I visualized myself in your character's shoes and felt for him. That is the highest compliment a writer can get in my opininion. My only criticism is too much detail...it kind of slowed the story down. example :(He heard the sound of the ignition powering up and before he knew it he was off. ) Too much unnecesary detail can clog an otherwise good story and slow it down.

Other than that its a good story at least what I read of it. Much too long to be considered a short story. I think you put a lot of work into this and you are in too much of a hurry to get reviews. In other words this should be rewritten, and submitted to publishers as a book. It's good enough. It's relevent and important enough.

That's just my opinion....take my advice and rewrite it and try to get it published as a book. I have kids. I've been through moves so maybe you touched a nerve with me but I think you put way too much into this to give it away on the web.

Best wishes and keep writing.
Steve Z

Posted 17 Years Ago