The beginning of the end.

Imagine a place set out like a war zone.. guns firing, planes flying overhead and trenches everywhere. Now imagine that this zone is the place your mind and your heart and feelings live.. where everything you are takes form in one way or another. This is where I live inside, my emotions and feelings are the land and environment that I am in and the bullets and missiles are the weapons people use on me every single day.

I hide in a small fort that I have built for myself. The fort is built of the strongest materials and reinforced with even stronger materials again, yet it is constantly taking damage with every emotional attack. The walls are built of rocks, infused with diamond and then covered in steel, they are about 15 feet thick built entirely around a place of total serenity, a rainforest setting with a small pond surrounded by some mossy rocks to which a stream flows from a small waterfall a few metres away. There is a small flock of birds spread throughout and one Koi fish within the pond. I’m not sure how but within this space I can breathe, it’s difficult and sometimes it gets more restrictive but every now and again it’s like there is fresh air flowing through from somewhere far away from this battlefield. The grass feels so dense and soft under my hands as I sit next to the pond and watch the Koi circling around inside.. I wonder if it feels as trapped as I do. The birds in one of the nearby trees sing to each other but their song seems almost sad instead of the usual happy and upbeat tune. Although there is no roof on my sanctuary it seems to repel all attacks from above and shows an illusion of a clear blue sky.

I lived in this space all alone, with my own thoughts and no-one I can trust. I let someone enter my sanctuary once and for a while it was nice to have someone so close to comfort me. They looked after me for a long time and I grew dependent on that care. I guess you could say I forgot myself, my dreams, my strength. Over time the walls started to break down, first the steel began to melt like lava, the diamonds began to lose their sparkle and crumbled to flecks of shiny dust and the rocks fell with nothing to support them anymore. The trees began growing further out towards the walls and beyond, the waterfall started to increase in pressure and push more water down the little stream and somewhere in the newly formed lake, the Koi was lost. The birds began screaming more high-pitched songs that made no sense at all and seemed to follow me everywhere now. I became blinded and even distracted by the newly found opportunities in front of me. My sanctuary became something much more than I had ever thought it could be.

The war outside our walls was still raging however even though the walls had crumbled, and the strength of two was stronger than one against the attacks. Bullets seemed to bounce off us and missiles only scratched our armour slightly, together we were unstoppable. Not so bad you might think.. well think again. Over time the attacks start hitting the same place and wearing deeper and deeper before penetrating the skin beneath the armour and eventually opening a wound. Now wounds themselves are easy to live with, provided you take proper care of it to avoid infection. But what happened here was not expected at all.

I was so busy fighting the war and protecting someone else that I didn’t realise my armor had been worn to threads and that I had actually been hit in my chest with a dart. This dart was laced with a poison that instantly woke me up and showed me things much more clearly. A concentrated infection of betrayal began.

Suddenly the person standing next to me was my worst enemy and the war going on around me was the exact thing I was trying to protect myself from in the first place, the birds were screaming warnings and gossip, the walls had actually been taken down from the inside, the waterfall had been rushing down into the stream so hard, that the lake had turned into a swamp and the Koi had been swept away, the blue sky had suddenly become a dark shade of grey with the faint sound of rumbling thunder and suddenly I’m surrounded by darkness.

So here I am.. no sanctuary.. no armour or defence.. seeing things from a clearer perspective.. and all alone in the dark with a poisoned dart in my chest. What now?

Author's Note

I would appreciate honest feedback only thankyou.

Reviews

[Kshitij Srivastava]

The feelings so familiar and yet the writing so original and refreshing. Just the fact that you actually asked readers to 'Imagine' did'nt work for me. Again, it might have been intentional. It was a captivating read. Thanks for sharing.
P.s. i might have no idea, what I'm talking about. I am not a regular reader or a writer. You can challenge and correct me, if you have the time to.