Last Prayer BY: My Friend Leigh

This poem was written by my friend Leigh...

This poem was written my my friend Leigh and she wanted to know what ya'll thought about it... So please leave comments

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Now i lay my head to sleep

I pray to thee with all my heart

To tack my soul this very ight

I ask of thee to let me slumber

For all my days and all my years

No longer restless in my soul

Now laying quietly in my box all alone

From those who have hurt me so

no longer feeling

I am hurt by all those

No longer feeling anything

Pain is gone from my soul

From all the years I have lived in pain

Welcoming the numbness

Happy that i am numb

In my wooden box I lay

Thinking thee for

Granting my wish

Of numbness

Today

Reviews

This is an interesting poem. The flow is a bit scattered but that is easy to fix. Try to avoid repeating. I mean it works with some writing, here it detracts from the piece. The message is a little foggy. If the person dead, dying or just going numb? Based on the shape of the poem I took it that the subject was dieing. It looks like a knife to me. Overall there is a lot of potential here. A little spit and polish and you have a really good poem. You can email me for details if you like.

[Ruth]

Beautiful, the senses numbed through prayer, almost, transcending....the structure is concise and easy to absorb :) xx

[Kenneth The Poet]

Not bad, kind of creeptastic but great nonetheless.

[Brad]

sounds like one of those eerie child-like nursery rhymes that make the hairs on the back of the neck stand