Hot Summer Night

Senryu

 

 

 

 

---Sweat Glints On Hot Skin

---Teasing Lips And Fingertips

---Eyes.. Begging.. For Love..

Reviews

[Emily Rose]

Talk about saying a lot in a few words! You do a great job of capturing desire and longing in this senryu. Wonderful imagery! Of course, I'd expected something a bit more nature-centric, but this was a pleasant surprise. Good choice using the ellipses at the end, too - it makes us hang on for a that extra second, increasing our sense of anticipation for the next words. Why did you choose to only use two dots in the ellipses, though? Why not the traditional three? It'd put more space between the words... :-)

[Dalebear]

Love the title

[Brianna Brie]

This poem sizzles! Great title to top it off.

[alyssa]

Short and sweet!! i love it.. it was discriptive useing soo little words!! keep writing!!
hugs
alyssa

[Miss Prince]

Yes.
That's all I can say. Mainly because I don't want to clog your review with how much I like it. So...
Yes.

[Flow]

Love how you captured the desire and wanting in this short verse..

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

A very sweet and passionate write in such few words... fantastic.

[FuMiko]

It's so powerful, words that really stay with you. You've captured something in a way that no one else could've thought of-- I love it, and it isn't so lengthy that I could very well read it more than once.
Thank you for sharing!

[Christopher 'Windstorm'..]

awsome little poem, full of heat and lust. and you got the feel of the senryu just right well done

[Jason Nuciola]

i dont like it

[J.P.O.et]

Excellent, the last line is amazing in it's complexity
the longing, 'begging' invokes so many scenarios such as a forbidden love or the other lover
Last line is magnificent, nicely done

J.P.O.et