Wäre ich ... / Would I be ... / Si je serais ...

A German poem with an English and French translation.

 

Wäre ich ein Land

so wollte ich sein

eins ohne Hungersnot,

Krieg und Misere

 

Wäre ich Tinte

so wollte ich sein

Worte von Glück,

Frieden und Zufriedenheit

 

Wäre ich eine Berührung

so wollte ich sein

sanft und zärtlich

und doch erquickend

 

Wäre ich ein Buch

so wollte ich sein

ein lustiges, naturverbundenes

und philosophisches Werk

 

Wäre ich Musik

so wollte ich sein

verführerisch und träumerisch

und einladend zumTanz

 

Wäre ich ein Baum

so wollte ich sein

inmitten der Natur,in reiner Luft

 und geniessen die Aussicht

 

Wäre ich mein Ich

so wollte ich sein

so wie ich wirklich bin, tief in mir drin

ohne Verstellen und Maskerade - eben einfach nur ICH! 

 

+°+°+°+°+°+°+°+°+

 

Would I be a country

I'd like to be

one without famine,

war and misery

 

Would I be ink

I'd like to be

words of happiness,

peace and contentment

 

Would I be a touch

I'd like to be

sensitive and tender

and also invigorating

 

Would I be a book

I'd like to be

a cheerful, close to Nature

and philosophical work

 

Would I be a tree

I'd like to be

amidst Nature, in pure air

enjoying the view

 

Would I be music

I'd like to be

swinging and dreamy,

and inviting to dance

 

Would I be my I

I'd like to be

as I really am - deep down within me

without feigning and masquerade - just simply I

 

+°+°+°+°+°+°+°+°+

 

Si je serais un pays

J'aimerais être

Un sans famine

Guerre et misère

 

Si je serais de l'encre

J'aimerais être

Des mots de bonheur

De paix et de satisfaction

 

Si je serais un contact

J'aimerais être

Doux et affectueux

Ainsi que réconfortant

 

Si je serais un livre

J'aimerais être

Un ouvrage gai, connecté à la nature

Et philosophique

 

Si je serais de la musique

J'aimerais être

Séduisant et rêveur

Et incitant à danser

 

Si je serais un arbre

J'aimerais être

Au plein milieu de la nature, entouré d'air pur

Et jouissant de la vue

 

Si je serais mon Moi

J'aimerais être

Comme réellement je suis au profond de moi-même

Sans dissimulation et mascarade - tout simplement MOI

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[[untitled]]

I love the idea of this. I also like how you used the same basic beginning line in each stanza, it connects everything nicely. I agree with Rosary, though, I feel like something is missing. I don't know how you feel about constructive criticism, some people get offended when others try to help...but if you would like I think I could help you make this a little smoother. If you'd like. If you love this the way it is, then pay no mind to my criticism. I know a lot of times I pick certain things a certain way and other people don't like it. I think it's a wonderful poem and the idea is original, so don't think it's not a good piece. You did a damn good job...good luck in the contest! =)

[Steve Thompson]

The concept is solid, and I didn't find any grammar mistakes. I thought the concept alone is very catchy, and pleasing to read. You gave examples to what you would be in ceratin situations, and simly as you gave it to the reader, a solid piece.

[Christopher 'Windstorm'..]

well done!

[vanishing]

Angel
you ponder as a way of opening
heart like a book containing
the reasons for solice-happiness
your words create an amazingly peaceful
feeling-this is beautiful

[Adventerous Amy]

[Stacy]

I am very glad you entered the contest, I hope you enter the one that is running now too.

[Rosary]

Its pretty good theres something missing though i cant put my finger it but i like the use of both language thats pretty cool if i come up with anything else ill let you know

[Stacy]

Very well written, thank you.

[Dawn]

This is an amzing poem, thank you so much for sharing it, keep writing.
Dawn