The Enemy of Perfection

What are you doing?

Oh hi, God. I’m just settling down to work on the stuff I need to get done before my self-image plummets deeper into despair. That’s all. What’s up?

Are you okay?

Uh, obviously not, so yeah! Doing great! I should have just enough juice to make it across that endless cavern of shame. *cough* I mean, that deeper crevice of the endless cavern of shame. I almost forgot that I always live down here, at some depth. Now don’t get me wrong; I don’t like living here. And that’s why I don’t want to fall deeper.

Would you like me to take you out?

Take… what? Out? Uh… Somehow I don’t think You understand. See, I can never get out. It breaks the rules, see? I’m never going to be perfect. I know that sounds like a bad thing, but it’s actually good, see? It means that I’ll always have someone beside me. Well, technically above me. See him up there? That’s my good buddy perfection. We get along great. I always hold tight to the other end of his electric fence wire that zaps me harder the deeper I go. My hands kinda hurt, but…

Does it work?

Work? Of course it does! Do you know how much worse off I’d be if I let go of this thing? I’d fall deeper and deeper into chaos and waste without a sense of reprimandation for recovery! Come now, God, You and I both know I’d be much worse off. But see, if I never let go of the rope, the hateful pain of my depths will inspire every ounce of energy in my body to scramble back up to a more tolerable level of pain. Genius system, wish I’d thought of it.

What about grace?

Grace? Oh yeah, that stuff introduces all manner of problems into the system. It sorta like makes you immune to the pulses of pain, letting you fall farther without empowering you with the necessary self-will to get yourself up again. I mean, it’s nice in the short term. But as far as long-term progress and productivity goes? It’s more danger than it’s worth.

Are you happy down here?

Course not! That’s why I hold the rope. I want to be the least unhappy that I can be throughout this whole adventure, see?

Are you content in your unhappiness?

Well… No. I’ll never be content. If I ever got content, complacency would doom me to deeper depths. I must always stay rooted in discontentment or I’ll stop growing and moving upward.

Do you wish to be content and happy?

Well… Yes. But see, that’s actually impossible. Cause I’m always falling deeper, and unhappiness grows the deeper I fall, while discontentment is what motivates me to climb back up. So I have to make trade off’s: less unhappiness requires more discontentedness cause that’s what it takes to climb up. But less discontentment means greater unhappiness because I fall deeper without motivation. See? I can’t be less discontent and less unhappy simultaneously. It just doesn’t work like that.

What makes you happy?

Being less imperfect.

What makes you content?

Again, being less imperfect.

And perfection is your goal?

Yeah! It took awhile, but You’re finally catching on.

Why?

Um, obviously because perfection is the highest goal that anyone could attain. Why not shoot for the best? Even if you miss, you’ll still get a lot closer than if you shoot for anything else. Otherwise you’re guaranteed to miss even worse.

Are there any other goals worth attaining?

Maybe, but as an individual with limited time and resources, any other goals would distract me from achieving as near-perfection as I can manage in this lifetime. That’s what You want for me, right?

What?

You want me to be perfect, right? “Be perfect as I am perfect,” right? “Be imitators of God,” and “You will become like Him because you will see Him as He is.” We’re supposed to become like You, and You’re perfect, right? “Let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.” You want me to become perfect. So I have the responsibility to focus as much as is humanly possible on attaining that goal, right? Right?

Son…

Huh? Don’t You mean, “Perfect-person-in-training?”

My son… Who am I?

You’re God; you’re the definition of perfection.

My beloved child, Who am I to you?

You’re the author and perfector of my faith. You began a good work in me and will be faithful to perfect it until the day of Jesus Christ. You hate sin and imperfection.

Do I hate you? You are imperfect.

Well, yes. I am imperfect. I know I sure hate my sin and imperfection. I guess… I mean… You know how You were talking about grace earlier? Well, see, that’s the problem. If You’re just going to look with grace on my imperfections, then I’ve gotta be doubly hard on myself because You won’t pick up the slack and force me to become better!

Do You know why I offer grace?

Why?

Because I love you.

Then love must be the enemy of perfection. For if love inspires grace which lets sin and imperfection carry on unchallenged, then it is indeed the greatest enemy to perfection.

I am Love.

What?

I, God, am Love.

But… no, this can’t be! You… You’re the creator of this perfect world! You made it all perfectly and Your whole plan is to restore it to perfection someday!

Why?

So that things can be perfect again, like You!

Why does that matter?

Because we’re made in Your image, made to be perfect.

If I wanted perfection, I wouldn’t have made you the way I did.

What?

Perfection was never My reason. Do you know why I made you?

Why?

Love. I am Love. We made you for fellowship, perfect fellowship, with Us. That is how you were made in Our image. Made to love and be loved.

Really?

Yes. So what is your purpose?

To love.

And what if that love is imperfect?

Then that imperfect love is still a gift and a blessing that pleases You.

And why should the world and your heart be restored to perfection?

That love may be perfected in us.

Perfect love casts out fear, because fear has to do with punishment.

That’s weird, ‘cause I thought the purpose of punishment was to purge imperfection.

Then why would I punish Jesus, the image of perfection?

Oh right. Love.

Now you’re catching on.

So it doesn’t ultimately matter how close to perfection I get before I die? Your plan for me is simply to perfect my love towards others and You?

Yes, and who else?

Who else? Besides You and everyone else? I don’t… oh… myself?

Yes. I love you, my child. Please show yourself the same kindness and care I expect you to show others.

Yes, Lord. I will try.

Are you ready?

Uh… ready for?

To experience the “impossible?”

What’s that?

Contentment in my love for you and joy and delight in loving others?

Happiness and contentment?

Yes, and grace to go along with both.

But… but what about perfection?

It will come in time. Remember, it’s the end result, not the goal. The goal is love. Now come, take my hand, walk in love, and in so doing fulfill the law of Christ.

I will. I will! And God?

Yes?

Thank You.

You’re welcome, my beloved child.

…

And son?

Yeah?

You’ll have to let go.

Oh yeah. It just… it feels so wrong to let go of my lifeline with perfection.

But…?

But it feels so right to hold onto You. You’re right. Oh, God, may I cling to You as desperately and relentlessly as I did to perfection. May my focus and goal be to love those around me as I have been loved by You. Take these imperfect offerings of surrender; may they bless Your heart as a pleasing and delightful aroma. May I… What?! We’re out of the endless cavern of shame?

You have been clothed in perfect righteousness through the blood of Christ, cleansed from all iniquity. When you see yourself the way I see you, you need not live in shame.

With man, this is impossible, but…

With God, all things are possible. Come! Take up your cross and…

Keep in step with Your Spirit, wherever He goes. I trust You. Just, please, never let go, okay?

Lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.

The end of the age… when I’ll finally be united in perfect fellowship with You. I wonder who else wants to come!