The Mermaid to the Elven in a Cube

i sit here,

  clamshell on my lap,

  a waterfall in my mind,

  a goldfish in my heart,

your brown eyes behind these

mechanical paper tapes,

behind every sheet of paperless letters,

piercing my gut like this cabled lock

stuck on my laptop.

  damn that stupid not-so-blonde tresses

  tapping at your back,

  while i mewl like a dying forest

out of luck.

Reviews

[Belle]

the everyday work, or the mundanity of life traps our imagination...but not in this case, at least, i think...on the other hand,working on/with the computer gives us the opportunity to see the natural world, feel and enjoy them through the screen or in our mind's eyes.

anyway, i was in the same position a day ago, while traveling back home from another province after a tiring yet fulfilling community outreach,one minute I suddenly missed the Chicago City Lights, then the following minute I missed the music at the bar near the shore in our city...April and May had become a very busy summer months for me, and in between those months is the longing to feel the sea breeze and to hear once again the song of the river.

we all need a break after all...we can never deny that break calls us on the time we need it the most, only that we disregard its voice.

What a powerful poem, Mary Ann. I wish I've written this!

Those three lines that came before the final line, god, so alive! They are a call!

[Androglossia]

we all need a break indeed. it was in those 4 long years that I realized i couldn't write while i'm preoccupied of something, or when I'm on the move or too overwhelmed with something too fascinating or too disgusting. no such feeling could make me write. but only when I'm still, physically, mentally, or when I'm devoid of emotion.

thank you for reading Belle, you know you're one of the few writer's a look up to, don't you?

[Bhuyanshi Talukdar]

Your poem is a powerful and deeply emotional reflection on the pain of unrequited love. I was struck by the vivid imagery you used, particularly the description of the mechanical paper tapes and the cabled lock. Your use of sensory details helps to transport the reader into the scene and creates a sense of longing and heartache. I appreciate how you explore the theme of rejection and how it can feel like a physical pain. Overall, your poem is beautifully written and thought-provoking.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

I really love those first three lines. There is nothing like escaping to nature to clear the clutter of life from our mind.

[willweb]

And again...the visions that come from your mind, the imagination of your muse, the words you choose to use, all add up to some damn amazing poetry.

Glad I stopped by your neck of the woods today.

[Androglossia]

Thanks again.

[The Twin Arenas]

Wow - this is beautiful. "while i mewl like a dying forest." Big fan.

[Taino]

Very well done-Imagination tethered is not imagination at all. So many themes of everday life pulling us in so many directions that its practically impossible to focus on ourselves and our dreams. Please keep writing and creating.

[Foxemerald]

Lovely use of color. The self-portrait in the piece is simple and charming. You bring out the eyes, and the personal features, and enhance them by showing the internal thought process to the protagonist in the piece. Touching upon the surface of the thoughts in such a personal way brings out the inspiring moments that people feel, but often do not take the time to put into words . . . lovely piece.

[Coyote Poetry]

Amazing use of words and thoughts. You create place and visions. I wanted to know an read more. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[gabrielle]

I often wonder how those in LDR keeps the fire burning.. amazing poetry!

[Androglossia]

Thanks gab!

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Some really nice metaphors used here... love can keep us hanging on even after it has let us go.

[Androglossia]

thank you!