"The Price Of Admission..."

Part of the Chapbook - "The Echoes Of Thunders"

One can care, but takes two to share.
The price of admission is always ...due, ya know?

"The Price Of Admission..."

I never hear you
you wait
out of hearing...
out of - having.

...And the tears
- so pale, quiet and frail,
and my fingertips just trace
so softly and lightly...
and each nail edges and slides -
my heart ...our 'time.

..........

crying...
- just beyond my reach
out of living...
- everything I can only dream - having.

so - flavor my world
-- silly-sad, ...dark and empty...
-- that Cheshire grin
held within
finds
your cheek, your life ...our 'time.

..........

 

I never hear you ...crying...
you wait - just beyond my reach
out of hearing... out of living...
out of - every thing I can only dream - having.

...And the tears ...so - flavor my world
- so pale, quiet and frail, -- silly-sad, ...dark and empty...
and my fingertips just trace that Cheshire grin
so softly and lightly... held within
and each nail edges and slides - finds
your cheek, my heart - your life ...our 'time.

IS the price of our admission...

Chris

Author's Note

Part of the Chapbook "The Echoes Of Thunders

One can care - takes two to share...

Feel free

Reviews

[Penlady]

....I think, at least I think I think, probably should say I believe, that most of the tears, pent up o'er fears have let loose in a deluge that washed so much away. Clearer day, so to speak, not fearing fear.
I read you crying about life, not having and etc. and I shake my head, ashamed of me. I HAD but my pent up fears and tears were caused by the fact that I didn't realize what I had.
Things that happened to me, negatively, don't matter now that I am over the bridge and can still see back, but look so much more to the NOW and sharing.

[Jasmine]

a lot of this works very well... there is a verse that, I think, doesn't compliment the rest so well:
"crying...
- just beyond my reach
out of living...
- everything I can only dream - having."

I don't know why... maybe because it doesn't seem as imaginative as the rest. There are, maybe, a few things that still need tweaking, but I really liked the way you concluded - it was very rounded and pulled the whole meaning of the poem together.

Nice work. x

[emmajoy]

There's a touch of silk in this, smooth, precious, soft, beautiful, ''so - flavor my world ~~ -- silly-sad, ...dark and empty... ~~ -- that Cheshire grin held within ~~ finds ~~ your cheek, your life ...our 'time.'

words that wrap feelings into treasure, magnify what two being one really means; feelings that there's one somewhere, almost near enough; and knowing that if you once touched, you'd both spin into space..

a feeling, instinct aware .. ' finds ~~ your cheek, my heart - your life ...our 'time. ~~ IS the price of our admission...

[?]

I feel such softness..such tenderness reading this...I guess you could say my heart melted. Such a touching piece..
I agree, it takes two to share...
This makes my eyes smile...beautiful

[Penlady]

.......such a tender touch your words have. One FEELS just reading, Time has to have value since it is SPENT and when spent used up. What a valuable entity it becomes when spent sharing. Thank you for the heart speak.

[sharonlee]

..And the tears ...so - flavor my world ...

... but the thought of a smile feeds the heart.

[Ed Hart]

you cast a spell Chris in your own inimitable way

[J. J. Nightingale]

Ok .. had to look up "Chapbook " .. But now I know . .. .. Being alone, never touching any-one in Our time .. is a waste .. Time is what we should share .. and a heart needs caring ..
A wonderful write Chris .. touches deep .... A sorrow shared, is half a sorrow, a Joy shared, is twice a Joy .. ..

Jasmine ..

[Emily B]

i got a reprieve from drying, but then the sounds of washing have pretty well stopped too

maybe a nap is in order