"A Taste Of A Different ...Way."

"A Taste Of A Different ...Way."

A Story by Chris
"

A taste of a different "way"

"

"A Taste Of A Different ...Way."

 

White, gray-brown, green-edged muck and slick.  Snapped branches, foot-spread mud and earth.  Slapping leather, wheezing gasps ...rising and thinning breaths ...faster - run FASTER...   Distant CRAAACKS... distant... dull sounds, ending - sounds.  Fainter... fainter echoes.

 

Feet slapping, slapping... slapping.  Breath - hard pulled, sharp exhales... eyes - tunneled, wide - blinking, tearing... rapid edging side-to-front head-turned... behind and back.. slapping, slapping!

 

Burns...burning...sooooo dry-dry.. dry - gasping.. harder, harder.  Slapping, slapping!  Faster  -  FASTER!  Oh... Oh... slowing, slllooowwwiiiinng...slowing...

Stop... stopping, stopping... Oh, Oh, oh...   Breathing...catching...

 

Straightening.  Breathing deep.

 

Watching the fire reflect in the sky.  Skeletons of winter trees standing stark and sharp in the flames.  Flickering, dancing, shimmering orange-red-yellow hues.  Distant sounds... muted sounds... echoing inside.  Staring...staring... weightless, just leaning and leaning and leaning to the ground - part of it - on it - in it...eyes viewing the wrinkled edges - forming, being my fingertips grasping and grasping the earth.  Tight, so very, very tightandhardand emptyfull.  God it hurts... hurts

 

...being me...

 

Chris

© 2013 Chris


Author's Note

Chris
feel free

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Featured Review

I read this earlier and thought for a spell, then I came back and read it again. How deep do I think? It is very descriptive... And also not. Thoughtful to a human condition perhaps, and it also reads to me of a simply difficult time maneuvering through the winter, snow covered surroundings. I actually think it quite brilliant that you have left enough vagueness for your readers to interpret it in a number of ways.
Good writing, my friend.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

I feel this. The running, escaping, but not being able to leave. The cracks threatening, the fire in the sky not a beacon but a warning. You have to stay, because you are true, and loyal, always.

Posted 4 Years Ago


Its going straight to my library , wonderful piece of work , you are an amazing writer. Keep it up CHRIS

Posted 11 Years Ago


I love how you wrote this piece. The short sentences allowed me to feel and see what was going on. It sucked me in and i followed it till the very end. Wonderful job.

~Your friend Res

Posted 11 Years Ago


The music adds a push to the read. I felt like I was on a runaway horse. The one word, "emptyfull" discribes the feeling at the end of the race... I felt this write. I live it! I think we need to realize we are not the only ones who feel this way. It does hurt. We all hurt. Especially those who we think do not at all, because it is all locked inside and the pressure is never let off.
A wonderful write Chris!

Posted 11 Years Ago


For you have such intense expression and that comes from an immensely open and spiritual mind that moves me every time - this has such perfect flow, I am left breathless...I do believe I am forever to be literally charmed by your work! xox

Posted 11 Years Ago


I like your use of fragments and unusual arrangement on the page, onomatopoeia, and combining words to create this glimpse of intensity.

Posted 11 Years Ago


Nice work.

Posted 11 Years Ago


It hurts... to feel, and yet the human creature cannot but feel, to the end.
.♥.

Posted 11 Years Ago


I read this earlier and thought for a spell, then I came back and read it again. How deep do I think? It is very descriptive... And also not. Thoughtful to a human condition perhaps, and it also reads to me of a simply difficult time maneuvering through the winter, snow covered surroundings. I actually think it quite brilliant that you have left enough vagueness for your readers to interpret it in a number of ways.
Good writing, my friend.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Man this is pretty neat! I like your 'thoughts and feelings' writing style

Posted 11 Years Ago



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Added on March 6, 2013
Last Updated on March 6, 2013
Tags: Writing, CHris

Author

Chris
Chris

Lansing, MI



About
"Life is a terminal disease." All the doctors have basically told me so. "Life is an adventure... Pain, well you deal. Thanks for being here. 06/21/2020 I'm back and working on. I've been.. more..

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