Unearthing Life 5

If you choose to stay close to me ,

I might name our child "Proximity";

If you run away,

tasting with your wings,

the endless freedom you awaited,

The child would perhaps

 get the name "farness"  .

Irrespective of what is in store,

I still have the firm belief ,

that our offspring will see the light in time. 

Reviews

[TrimarcoRansome]

Your punctuation sort of threw me out of kilter, the first time i read this. I Re-read it ignoring the punctuation and it flowed much better. Some poems just don't lend themselves well to punctuation or need very little. This needed very little to remain how you intended it to be.

[Anand Sehgal]

thanks a lot for the feedback, I will keep in mind :)

[Shane Mohamed]

A poem of anticipation and prediction. One could only hope for what's best. Thanks for sharing.

[Anand Sehgal]

thanks so very much Shane for your visit and kind review :)

[Rachelle]

Waiting for a relationship to take the next step does involve choice. No matter the strength of emotions involved, circumstances and implications must also be carefully weighed such that, no matter which choice, something good comes out of it.

[Anand Sehgal]

Thanks so very much Mara, for the kind review .How have you been these days?

[Rachelle]

Good. Enduring subzero temperatures but looking forward to spring. How have you been doing?

[Saddam]

Beautifully write friend....
I love reading it.

[Anand Sehgal]

thanks so very much for the kind visit :)

[Saddam]

Welcome dear friend always

[A Soap Mess Stories]

excellently written...well done...

[Anand Sehgal]

Glad that you liked the write :)

[hardeep sabharwal]

Interesting, the expression and also the feeling, nice work to read :)

[Anand Sehgal]

thanks so very much for the review :)

[TL Boehm]

If you choose to stay close to me ,
I might name our child "Proximity";

standout lines in this poem. Well done.

[Anand Sehgal]

thanks so very much dear TL. How are you doing? I am into a writer's block !

[Jennie Baron]

Unique indeed in its premise, and it has a nice flow and rhythm. Well done!

[Anand Sehgal]

Thanks so very much Jennie for the kind review :)

[Pryde Foltz]

A lovely feel and expression to this one. There is something birthed from every relationship:)

[Anand Sehgal]

An wise review :) glad that you liked the write :)

[Matching Socks]

Very unique outlook, really like this one.

[Anand Sehgal]

Thanks so very much my friend :)