Sand/Untitled

About some girl

You are like sand,

a million little things at once
and yet so quick out of my hands

Drifting free in the matter of a breeze
never ending set of pieces and still perfectly complete

you won't be shaped, you won't retreat

you make it somehow hard to see

so blinded by the grains I wonder

what may lay down underneath

now modesty may be my virtue

and patience my belief

but still I know I will not have you

Though I couldn't call it grief

For I knew all along

that by the next wind you'll be gone

so I sit with the hourglass at peace

waiting for the last grain to fall.

You are like sand,

and someday I might get to desert

but for now I'll take the glance

Reviews

[LoveStar]

lots of love involved in explaining the mortality of the beloved. good job.

[Jstmds]

Thank you!

[emily.c.]

Lovely. Lots of different ideas in here and some mixed feelings, but great metaphor. lots of movements and imagery, I loved reading.

[Jstmds]

Thanks a lot for your comment, I appriciate it!

[Not Active]

This is a very emotional poem. I enjoyed reading it. Your writing style is very moving and you use imagery like a pro. Well done.

[Jstmds]

Thanks so much! It is indeed quite personal, I'm glad you like it.

[Tazeen Ahmed]

That's flawless! All imageries, personification adds so much depth to it!
The first stanza is also so intensely captured!!

[Jstmds]

Thanks a lot for your comment, really appriciate it!