They

A Poem by Mina Salva

My day sucked, I cried, I felt bad. I had to write these words down otherwise I couldn't stop myself from such thoughts..

I walk step by step, head held high
I don't worry, I don't care, I keep being wry
To the people who envy me, to the ones I offer my hate to
I ignore them, everything they say, everything they do
Despite my confidence, my charming smile, they found a way to bring me down

I can't feel myself, who I am or who I was
All I feel is hurt, they always mange to make me burnt
No I'm fine, then I smile
No you're not, you're so sore
Don't tell me lies, watch me, look at me awhile
My subconscious seems to care, it whispers me what's so sure

My thoughts go wild, they scream at me out loud
I'm torn, and I do not feel born
Hatred fills my lungs, it has passed the bound
I promise not to fall, "I'm tolerate" is what I've sworn

Feeling hollow isn't a neoteric phenom to me
But having wounds and cuts pursued by, is my new alley
I no longer feel infinite, I no longer feel alive
Can someone please enter in my life, and see where I'm at?
Can you jump in my shoes, and see the view I'm looking at?
Is it wrong, that I want to escape, hid, run away dignified?

I can't stop this fact, that I'm engulfed in the dark side of mine
I try to catch the light, but they took away the light behind my eyes
Is it insane, how a person can affect on you so wide?
I can't hold the hope, I can hold the hate, in my arm
If I will not welcome the gaiety, I might end up on harm

Poor, poor lightweight heart, just dream about the art
I'll be where I want to be, just don't lose another piece of yours
I will live, it will be the start
One day, I will know where I stand, I will open the doors

But in a twist of time, he says "You are all mine"
I founder deeply down, I can breath, but It's all mist
Slowly breathing arduously, my vision being blur
Wine on floor, I was too sure
That I was fine, or is it a lie?
This gray sharp metal slips on the ground
He, who is pain, taunts again, "Now, you're no longer mine"
The metal tool sunk into my soul, it's not on floor
The last sound is the collapse of my head
I believe they succeeded, I convinced myself that I was fine