We're not Even Close

We're not Even Close

A Poem by Amata Luna
"

Cold hands, shaking limbs, turning stomachs and a heart beating fast. What more description can I be more mad?

"

YOU DO JOKE ME?

There was this guy, a man I don’t know

At first he was sweet, but man he was cold

He used to be a honey; I discovered he was a dummy

Who never even cared, what a woman has or bared

Do you tease because I’m a woman; Are you mad because I am?

Did I stepped into your ego, Or you think I’m out of mind?

You have called me names before them; you have tested all I have

You have said worst things about me that I never even dreamed about

You think you’re macho? You think you’re cool?

Well think again honey, you might be looking like a fool

You don’t care I’m hurting? You don’t think I’m a girl?

Well I respect an older person, but not one who speaks like femme

I thought you’re cool, I thought you’re fine

But enough for those thinking, impressions never are just as slime

I’m born to be a woman; my mother raised me as one

My father told me to be human and always think of everyone

Do you ever act your age? Do you ever respect a babe?

I bet you do with naivety, I bet you don’t when you’re flared

Think about others, you’re not the only one alone

You think I’m self-centered? Well look at you who talk

It’s not about being a girl, unless you know how to be a man

Man enough to respect others, man enough to be MAN enough

You still hate me? Still I’m mad?

Well, young man you get wise not with age,

But what you ever learned that is as good as life.

© 2012 Amata Luna


Author's Note

Amata Luna
Forgive me my friends, but lend me your ears, you know I write when something brings me into it. Too bad it has to be, it has to be like this.

My Review

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Featured Review

Awesome! :D
very clear.. You expressed everything directly..sincerely..straight from your heart
i think..poems can be said really beautiful when there are genuine feelings in them...And yours is overflowing with striking emotions...
Outstanding piece.. thanks for sharing! :D


Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

The emotion is carried forth vehemently. Nicely done. You could work on the flow and English usage.

Posted 12 Years Ago


I'm liking this, but I think a little work on the flow would be better, and some some of the sentences may need some rearrangement. That's just me though, but yes, I like it, but I feel that the point is vaguely lost in the sentence structure.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Hahahaha, I love this. It's right to the point, and sets whoever you're speaking of in place. Good work.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Great! No words to describe your down-to-earth piece of writing. Keep it up!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

wew.... Very straight forward.... i was thinking of someone while reading this... but that person is super insensitive....... great piece!!! i love it..... (~^3^~)

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very straight-forward! And I was thinking of someone while reading this, a person just the same as the descriptions of the man you're talking about in this poem! Grr...He acts so gay and I hate it...He often makes fun of me...Tss...Kainis tlga...Bakla ata eh, haha! Napaka-manhid tlga...He doesn't even know that he's already hurting my feelings...Anyway, this was a powerful poem! Excellent work!
Deserves a 100... :)))

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Awesome! :D
very clear.. You expressed everything directly..sincerely..straight from your heart
i think..poems can be said really beautiful when there are genuine feelings in them...And yours is overflowing with striking emotions...
Outstanding piece.. thanks for sharing! :D


Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Vent away my friend, I love the sass!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

this is another unique way of self expression
.nice write
=]

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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12 Reviews
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Added on April 10, 2012
Last Updated on April 11, 2012
Tags: madness

Author

Amata Luna
Amata Luna

About
I write when something brings me to it. I write when somebody pushes me into it. I write when things are sad and when things are not. I write when I'm inspired. To inspire, I write. To share is to wri.. more..

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A Poem by Amata Luna



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