A Narcissist's Smile

A Narcissist’s Smile

Grinning ear to ear. 

He says nothing, yet you can hear the feline and deprecating tone through his eyes.

Though he does cry, he might smile through his teeth as if to pry the guilt for the selfish b*****d out by the soul and leave you with nothing but the pouring liquid of melted water running down your face as you wonder how this man, his fraud filled tears, trapped you in a box of self disgust and self pain. 

A narcissist’s knife cuts through you each time he throws it, no matter which way it's thrown. Those can cut through my Armor I have built for this moment. 

The armor that makes me stone and jello again and again. 

Ripped apart and tormented. 

Led to the slaughter-house like cattle from his grounded stare.

 Which would bore into your chest and leave behind a ghostly feel as though your spirit has left your body.

 That is, if you still have one after he takes your future in his hands and controls it like a puppet on a string.

 Pinocchio can never become a real boy when controlled by a narcissist and his need for his gut-wrenching smile, however rare it may be. 

Though you know that smile is more toxic than botulinum, you long for that smile because all you want is validation, because you want to be proud of yourself. Once it starts, it spreads like a bad case of chickenpox, but without the itchy spots. You would much rather want the pox than the narcissist’s smile. It envelops you until you don’t live, the only thing left is the carcass of a young girl who lives and breathes to make him happy, to only wish she could remove herself and live again. Thank you Dad, for the Narcissist’s smile.