Tattered Clothes

Who do you want to see?

Tattered clothes

He stayed put, lights out, nothing but the streetlights wan orange glow casting a weak light upon him from the street below. It felt as though the rain had grown heavier...truth was it had held steady for a few days. Storm clouds persisted, holding a heavy ceiling blending day with night. 

From the comfort of their...his flat that night, he looked out in to the street below. Could hear only the persistent, hissing rattle of the torrential downpour. At the bus shelter below, the same figure had been sat under it for around an hour. Head held low, draped in tattered clothes. Silent but for the rain, automated announcements for bus arrivals. 

The two had been still for the hour. Each with nowhere to go. Nothing to come between them but the coming and passing of buses, ignored. Head held low, tattered clothes. Soaked beyond care.

Inside, Joe took another sip of his beer, silent. No contact, nothing of the world save the rain and the lone figure. Things had been much like that since Helen left. It had all reached a final...whimper. She’d packed her things. 

He supposed Laura had been that final, decision. That final event. She was long gone too, a stranger now, if they’d ever really known each other. ‘Laura..’ he whispered, feeling the softness of the word, as gentle as she ever was. Gone now, as if she’d never been. He looked to the black sky, into the nameless, sightless distance. Laura, he thought. Where are you? If he could only know something. Though, why did he need to know?

Joe chose the street below again, the figure. The rain blanketed him once more, its' white noise a relaxing constant. The rain understood him, knew his thoughts, his dreams. He still dreamed of her. Two years had passed. Dreams of how she was, of winning her over, of whether she’d found her peace. Maybe not. With Helen gone, he felt..almost absorbed by them.

Another automated message from the bus shelter, echoed and indistinguishable. This time, the figure rose, lifted back its hood. Long brunette hair, shining eyes, warmth. Moving towards the bus as it drew closer. 

A shock ran through Joes' body, as his heart plummeted. He couldn’t believe it..her? Terrified of wasting a second, he grabbed what he could and bolted from the door. Ignoring the rain and darkness, not even considering what he was doing, he splashed and pushed on to the bus. The figure was there, resting by a window seat.

Joe swiped on. Stood still. He grew rigid, not knowing what to say. As the bus started to move, he sat in the next seat. His voice finally emerged, a mumble “L..Laura?”

A hood came down. What Joe saw was a homeless man, fairly young, looking unimpressed at having been bothered, “Alright mate?”

“Uh..oh uh sorry. Nothing.”

“Ok.”

Joe sat in embarrassed silence until the next stop, and shuffled out. Wherever she was now, he could never be there. The rain still poured, now a relentless melancholy, washing his anticipation to disappointment.  He crossed the quiet street to the next bus stop, heading back. Head held low, draped in tattered clothes. 

Reviews

[Vasilees Sybissyl]

That is so sad! And so beautiful. Unlike most writers out there, who narrate the misery one feels after someone important leaves like a synopsis, I could actually understand Joe in this work. I could feel his pain. Especially when it didn't turn out to be Laura.

Your writing style changes like the weather. One day all sunny and happy, the next day, sparkling with humour, and suddenly, bam! Feels and sadness all over. Words cannot convey how much I admire this talent of yours. Keep it up, mate!

Love,
Vasilees.

[Alex Ware]

Thank you! It often depends on how I'm feeling at the time, and a lot of the time some music or ambience helps.
I was listening to this at the time: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=usKnZsrvuOo

[emmajoy]

A finely written story, seems mysterious from the start but certainly didn't expect.. .. .. I don't want to say too much, don't want to tell the tale so that other readers see how it goes. What i must say is that you've created a short story that could become a full novel.. don't know how but there are various hints as to what has happened, is happened and.. who knows more.

Thank you so much for sharing. Suggest a few replacements for repeated words, shortening or lengthening sentences.. but.. my goodness there's more to come - surely!

[Alex Ware]

Thank you, I may be able to edit it and tie it in with something else if I get the time :)