I want to thank everyone who took the time to read and respond, not only to this the final version, but to all the previous ones as well, starting with the original "Discovery". The majority of you felt "As we wait hand in hand for the twilight, night turns to dawn...such is the magic and beauty of life"...ends and fits the poem best. Kate and I agree (though we love the other version as well). As kate so eloquently stated "it leaves me with a feeling of awe and wonderment at the majesty of life...a life of glorious discovery...
Hello friend! It's wonderful to read all of the feedback here, Allen. Just wonderful.
I truly like both options and I remember us going to and fro on this .... mingle and jingle ... remember?!!! If I remember rightly, I think we ended up preferring the second option ie
As we wait
hand in hand
for the twilight,
night turns to dawn...
Such is the magic
and beauty
of life
For me, ending this way, leaves me with a feeling of awe and wonderment at the magesty of life ... a life of glorious discovery....
I like both lines. But the below one is my favorite.
"As we wait
hand in hand
for the twilight,
night turns
to dawn...
Such is the magic
and beauty
of life... )"
A beautiful poem. The things we think about with coffee at the kitchen table. I enjoyed the complete poem. A very good ending to a excellent poem.
Coyote
I'm a poet, a singer, a peaceful gunslinger..
looking to share my poetry..and a little bit of me...if I dare
I 've been writing since I was 18.... am slightly older now, and still trying to fin.. more..