Aurora

"The urge to be a pilgrim created the constellation. It was meant to never reach the destination. Rain drops will never reach the end of the window they will just melt into an another dimension. Like I will. One day."

Her prohibited wonderment was the trophy for an a cappela choir of muted despair. 

The ashes of the last dreamer were meant to eliminate the reinforcement of coming melodies. 

Bordeaux curtains announced the final act. Suddenly a bass-voiced shadow started to  talk imperiously  to the choir:

"Get the sparkle out of her eyes and then freeze the endoprhin marche. Transplant her aura to the disabled optimists and aspired misanthropes."

The chorus  choked  coming verses of remorse. 

The rays of her aurora lighted epidermis were caught in epruvettes of broken hopes. 

The curtains are getting closer, while the ashes are conquering the aiguille with the anthem of her insomniac unrest:

"Pale claws of banishment are always gazed like kaleidscopes after dark bondages.  

May the sein of shooting stars illuminate the sacrifice."

The last tune has  finally reached the destination.

Reviews

[ANM]

Your words flow just like the universe seamlessly reaching the reader ! Lovely writing bravo!

[Jeannette Lunete]

Thanks for this beautiful review ANM. I appreciate it. :)

[ANM]

You are welcome!

[Wórdsmíth]

I`m stunned to read this line: "Rain drops will never reach the end of the window they will just melt into an another dimension. Like I will. One day." It`s itself full of insights... the insights which come outta your beautiful heart. Yeah, the fragrances are around everywhere but the true piece of incense--A real leaf of "Aurora with Aroma" can only be found into the shades of your love you brought to this universe. Nice imagery!

[Jeannette Lunete]

Thanks a lot Wordsmith for this magnificent review. I appreciate it. :)

[TL Boehm]

lovely rich writing - a poetic prose, full of beautiful words and imagery
May the sein of shooting stars illuminate the sacrifice."
I think that was perhaps the stand out line for me but the whole write is amazing

[Jeannette Lunete]

Thanks a lot for this kind and encouraging words TL Boehm. It means a lot to me. :)

[@zeewhykay]

Original prose is what keeps me coming back to this site with an unsatiable hunger. This is what I love finding on my own, my own little discoveries, as an archeologist of thought to paper. Props.

[Jeannette Lunete]

Thanks for the review Yann. I appreciate it. :)

[Rene Salinas]

Like a surealist painting a scene with many diferent sub - scenes the statements at the start they feel like a sort of steps as if walking down them. I felt the presence of the Nihilist and the Atheist from the rage of god becuase everything seems to point to material ending. As it gets to the end it remarks it even more The sacrifice will only be the sonata to the destination.

Alber Camus springs to mind.

Thankyou

[Jeannette Lunete]

Thanks for the review Rene. I appreciate it. :)

[Lydia Shutter]

"Rain drops will never reach the end of the window they will just melt into an another dimension" what a magical line this is! Such rich imagery! Kind of a sci-fi scene you have created here. Hmmm....coming melodies snuffed out because there are no more dreamers? What mad professor has decided this will happen? The day the music died? The day only darkness will permeate the world? Sort of a doomsday attitude, but the journey is charismatic. Lydi**

[Jeannette Lunete]

Thank you very much Lydia. I am glad that the journey brought you to the right destination. I am also glad that you precisely recognized all the elements that were behind the idea. I deeply appreciate it. :)

[AprilRN1210]

this is an exquisite display of rich language, emotion, and imagery.. it took my mind on a twisted journey, where at times, I wasn't sure where I was going, where I had been, and where I was.. the flow had me floating along, lost, but pleasantly so.. some of the phrasing and descriptions were divine.. am still scratching my head as to the overall meaning, but what a ride :)

[Jeannette Lunete]

Thaks a lot April for this delightful review. I am glad that you enjoyed the journey. It means a lot to me. :)

[AprilRN1210]

You're welcome. It was my pleasure.

[Chris]

I understand the full sense of my own mind's gathering of your words intent but their usage really feels individually muddled perhaps by a "stretching" of their normal usage... I liked the imaginings and the tones presented.

[Jeannette Lunete]

Thanks for the review Chris. I truely appreciate constructive criticism. :)

[Chris]

Your effort deserved no less. Language is our minds' use of the power of thought. Language is seldom transparent but the "shades" can define the images we perceive in ways that pause even ourselves.

[C. Rose]

Thanks for the friend request :)

"aiguille" - a sharp pointed pinnacle of a rock, based on the french root 'needle'. (I always enjoy learning a new word! I like this one.)

"insomniac unrest" feels redundant to me.
"shotting stars" - did you mean "shooting"?
Did you mean to end with a comma?
Should reinforce be reinforcement(s)?

Favorite phrases.
Prohibited wonderment
conquering the aiguille
illuminate the sacrifice

My understanding of this piece is that she is trying to give hope to the world but instead being overcome.
I am concerned some meaning is lost to the complex word play (which might be intentional on your part or else you might consider throwing in some plain structures to give the reader some hand holds).

[Jeannette Lunete]

You are welcome. :)
Thanks for the constructive review. :)