numb

heat went out in my apartment, while this is mostly an aesthetic/ imagery thing, I spent the night in a below zero kitchen trying to glean warmth from the oven.

there's frost growing from my fingertips like prickling moss and i can feel it stinging on my lips, the heat of my body lacks aggression, as do I, and so the cold things grow, immortalizing me in their crystalline life.

Reviews

[mercy party]

what are the actually rules of poetry? editing sounds like something to do with coffee breath in a full height cubicle. When you reach the big time, just hire an editor, until then keep writing awesome scores your way!

[Hebe]

Sounds cold to me :).. short but with enough description to feel the chill!

[Lovecraft]

Pretty good, though too short and requires editing. An evocatively visual but flawed poem. It needs more structuring and a better format.

[Alien]

Thanks for the criticism, editing has never been my strong suit, too short of an attention span, definitely something I need to work on.

[Lovecraft]

I just edit during my writing. I never really edit it after I've finished and posted my work. ;)

[Alessander]

Yikes. Sounds like torture.
I like how the person almost seems to be turning into an icicle before our eyes.

Numb can work on a literal and figurative level.

fav line "fingertips like prickling moss"

Hope u didn't get frostbite!

[Sir Drift & Mr. Pulse]

Oh this is simply beautiful with no extent. This in its simplest form has character all over it.

[Lorry]

Yeah, you are a writer, you maybe just don't know it yet. You paint a very vivid image with so few words, going beyond the original problem and expanding on how this can lead to a feeling of futility and what the hell's the point. Your last line here is perfect, great write.

[Not Active]

The imagery in this is very powerful. Though this is a very short poem, it is also very intense and well written. Nicely done.