Love Without Fear

Choices is what life mainly consists of. Choices of love play a part as well and whatever you choose, should not result in you asking yourself "what if?" If it does, then you're not satisfied.

The building was sweating rain droplets as Gracie and Noel sat underneath the restaurant's canopy awning eating their dinner. They were having a great time enjoying each other's company as usual. Gracie was a kind woman who loved life preciously and spent every day of it with a smile the best that she could. She was always at the school helping out with the children and giving back to the neighborhood any way that she could. She was famously known and there was no soul in the town with hatred against her. There was also a hidden side of her, revealing itself as she played footsie with Noel underneath the table, putting her lips in a quick pucker, blowing a kiss to him. He could tell by the way she looked at him what he was getting for dessert that night.

Noel had been Gracie's boyfriend for about nine months. Everyone says don't mix work with your personal life, but that's how the two of them met. They worked two different positions within the company, but at some point their departments had to team up which is how they were introduced to each other. Both being their team leads they shared their interest, proving their high logic skills and what they could accomplish together. Every since that day they had taken interest in each other as well and the more they worked together the more the feelings grew. Eventually they formed a bond outside of work, resulting in their relationship.

Gracie continued to tease Noel as they continued their dinner, but her eyes couldn't stop sweeping over to Benjamin who had walked by and sat at a table near them. He was sitting alone, facing the direction of Gracie and she couldn't help but smile at his presence. His muscles bulged through his gray t-shirt that he was wearing with splattered rain droplets on them. Benjamin was a close friend of Gracie's even before she met Noel at work. You could even say that they were best friends. He was always coming offering his services of assistance with her school projects, hanging around giving her someone to talk to, and fixing her appliances for free. He was, and still is, the town's handyman. He was also eye candy for most females, offering their hearts as payment. He ignored every attempt that another female would make for his heart, because his belonged to Gracie. It had been hers for a long time. One time she actually grabbed it from his chest with her bare hands after their first kiss. That only ending with her pushing him away. "I can't be with you. I'd be so annoyed feeling like I have to compete with every female in town," she said, hurt that she had to hurt him too. Benjamin didn't know how to convince her that there was no competition. He felt like just telling her wasn't going to completely change the way she felt. "I understand," he said, apologizing and leaving her alone. When he found out that she got into a relationship with Noel months later instead, he fell back, trying not to interrupt what they had. Even with the most heart clenching advances that the women threw at him, no one was enough for him, except Gracie.

When Benjamin actually looked back at Gracie, it was like dawn, a rising sun inside of her. Even though it was dark and raining. She looked away, but noticed Benjamin stood up, making his way to their table. It was daylight inside of her by this time, the sun has risen. He reached their table. "Hello Gracie, Noel, it's nice to see happy faces out in weather like this," he said, not wanting to be long. "Yeah, it's nice to see you again. You're here alone?" Gracie asked. Benjamin and Noel exchanged nods and shook hands. "Yeah, I just left Claire's fixing a leak in her sink. Though i'd grab a bite to eat before heading home." Benjamin could see the faded smile on Gracie's face after he had mentioned Claire's name. "Well, would you like to join sit with us and chat for a moment?" Gracie asked, not noticing the shade coming from Noel. "I'm not going to interrupt your dinner date, I just wanted to say hello. I'll see you two around sometime," he said, heading back to his table. He pulled paper and a pen out of his backpack that sat next to him and he began writing. Gracie remembered when he used to write her cute little stories that made her days brighter.

Noel didn't like Benjamin, he felt that he was a threat. Almost even woman in the town had an eye for him and he was hoping that Gracie wasn't falling for his charm too. Gracie made him happy, but compared to Benjamin, he started to feel like he wasn't enough. He thought about hitting the gym more, glancing at his narrow arms.

Benjamin had been locked on her mind since that night. She couldn't stop thinking about everything that they used to do and all the fun it was. Another thing that was locked on her mind was her garden. She needed more seeds for her fruit's and vegetable garden. She also needed some already grown to put into her apple pie for work. She was going to share it with her team on break as a thank-you treat for doing their jobs well. When she reached the fruit section of the grocery store she went straight for the red apples. "I never thought i'd see you in the store shopping for fruit knowing that you have the whole fruit and veggie section in your backyard." She smiled and turned around to face Benjamin. "You looking for some average quality red apples?" She asked, holding one up in front of his face. He took it from her hand. "You know I have the highest, most perfect quality apples in my backyard. You must of forgotten," she said. He plundered through the apples and picked up the most rotten of the bunch. "This seems really familiar. Reminds me of a certain garden..." he said, glancing at her. She shoved his shoulder. "Shut up! You know I was just starting and I failed at keeping the insects out of my fruit," she said. She remembered when he used to help her garden. Only when he was doing something to Mrs. Reynolds house next door. He'd look over the fence and throw something at Gracie to get her attention. He'd laugh at her gardening struggles and offered to help. They really did nothing but play around in it, resulting in them soaked in water. The thought made her miss those moments more. "My garden is actually much better thank you. Now that I can actually focus on it and not have someone distracting me," she said, smiling at him. "Noel doesn't help you?" He asked. "No, he's not too much of an outdoors person, he stiffens up at the sight of bugs." "Oh," he said, putting some apples in his basket. "Why aren't you using the apples that you grew again?" He asked. "Mr. Holt wanted all of them and he paid good money for them... because they are the best quality," she said. He shook his head. "So I'm in here buying some to make an apple pie for my team at work." "That's nice of you. And you work on that huge garden all alone. I know that must take a while during the day." "Yeah, but it's worth it. I enjoy being outside and the best part is when they actually grow. It's like I've created life." "I bet it is. I better get going, i'll catch you later," he said, walking off down the aisle. Gracie waved goodbye.

She missed his sarcasm and the way that he made her feel like she'd never be alone. He was always popping up whenever she needed help, and she loved that. She missed his playfulness and how he would put a smile on her face in even the most dullest moments in life. Gracie laid in bed, thinking of all the things that could and couldn't be between them. She also felt guilty for thinking about him the way she did when she was in a relationship with Noel. He was a good guy, but all she could say for him was that he was good company. Yeah, they have an interest in science, and go on dates, but there was nothing other than that. The only thing preventing her from giving her heart to Benjamin was the women, but could she trust him? He doesn't really see or hear of him being with another female other than in their house fixing their utilities. She wasn't even sure that fixing things was the only thing that was going on in their homes. He could be a man of serial romance. Her thoughts started getting the best of her as she lay in bed cuddled under a sleeping Noel. She loved him, but if she truly did, why was her heart going to someone else? That night her mind raced, comparing the two.

A few months later...

Her words rang choral through his ears and around his head. "I'm sorry. I hate hurting people when they don't deserve it," she said, playing with her fingers, her head down like a child. She couldn't be in a relationship with one guy when her heart was trailing off to another. "Who is it?" He asked. "What?" "Is it someone else? I don't see any other reason for us to break up besides it being someone else. I honestly don't see what I'm doing wrong." "No..." She didn't like lying, but at that moment she wanted to lie and say she needed space and just go home. "Its Benjamin isn't it?" "Why out of all people would you think it's him?" Noel stood up and began pacing back and forth on the living room floor. "I mean... It's the way you two look at each other when you're talking. You're always smiling at him." "I smile at everybody." "It's different with him," he said as he sighed and stop walking. "Have you been cheating on me?" Noel asked. "No! You know I wouldn't hurt you like that. I'm just having personal issues and I need to work them out." "Let me help you. That's what I'm here for." "I'm sorry..." She started to get up to leave, but Noel was upset. "Yeah, leave and go straight to Benjamin. You're no different from any other woman in the town that wants him." Gracie's heart dropped at his words. She left and all that was on her mind was the reason that she didn't want to be with him.

Taking a buck out of his wallet to pay the merchant, Benjamin didn't notice Noel heading towards him. "It must be nice having every woman in town in the grasp of your hand," Noel said. Benjamin gave a confused look. "What are you talking about?" Benjamin asked, receiving his coffee from the merchant. "Nothing. I'll catch you around," Noel said as he walked away, bumping shoulders with Benjamin in the process. Benjamin turned around to look at him as he walked away, not wanting to start any trouble he just brushed the situation off.

Gracie was highlighting notes in her work journal when she heard her phone buzz. It was Benjamin calling. She answered it, "hello?" "Hey Grace, my grandmother is preparing a meal for this cooking competition again and I need your help," he said. "Let me guess, she's competing against Mr. Hamilton and you require my superior gardening services?" She teased. "You know what? Maybe I thinking I should check out Mr. Clayton's garden. His sure does look promising." "Hey now! How dare you try to take services from my competition. I'll be waiting for you to come over and be amazed." "Great, see you in a few," he said, hanging up the phone. Gracie paused for a moment, realizing that Benjamin was coming over. She looked at her outfit and noted her lazy pajamas she was wearing. She went upstairs to change and fix her hair up.

She walked downstairs due to hearing some scratching sound on the opposite side of her door. She stepped closer, trying to figure out what's making that sound when her thoughts were interrupted by the doorbell. "Who is it?" She called out. "It's Ben, with Ralston as my plus one." She opened the door to be greeted by a most energetic dog. "It seems like he missed you," Benjamin said. "I missed you too Ralston," Gracie spoke, rubbing the dog's head. "Babycakes would be glad to see you," she added. Babycakes was Gracie's cat. Her cat was quiet unfriendly and mostly kept to herself when it came to anyone besides Gracie. She and Ralston didn't quite get along. "Are you ready to be amazed?" Gracie asked Benjamin, walking towards the back of the house. Benjamin followed.

They arrived in the garden and Benjamin looked at the produce in shock. He did have a bit of doubt that Gracie did it all herself. He did admire her hardworking. "This is amazing," he said. "Thank you. Pick whatever you like." "Okay. By the way, is Noel okay?" "What do you mean?" "Well, he came by the shop a few days ago and he seemed upset." "Well... I kind of... broke up with him," Gracie said. Benjamin was in shock once again. "What!?" "Yeah..." "Why?" "Honestly?" "Are we keeping secrets now?" "No it's just... I left him because of you." "Because of me?" "I can't take my mind off of you Ben. I never have. I tried to get over you, but not even being with someone else completely worked." "Grace..." Benjamin said, but Gracie continued. "I'm sorry. I can't stop thinking about you. We used to have so much fun and you always made me happy and I..." Gracie stopped talking when Benjamin stepped in front of her, embracing her in his arms. He looked into her eyes and said, "Gracie, I've always loved you. You're more special to me than any of these women in town. You're beautiful and I'd be stupid as hell to lose you if I had you." Her heart stopped. "I just..." She tried to add. "You can trust me with all of your heart. I'm all yours Grace." "I love you too Ben," she said. He knew that he would do his best to make sure that she would be constantly reminded that she was the only one for him. He finally kissed her and this time she didn't push away.